Subpoenas, Strategy & Soft Hearts: How to Get Fair Divorce Outcomes Without Going to War

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We live we're live. Okay today. I definitely

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got the triple B's. No, it's actually the quadruple

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B's Okay, so meet Becky Sampson brave Beautiful.

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I mean, beautiful. I think I've told Becky about

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150 times. We did meet before over the phone.

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And then did I go on your LinkedIn and help you?

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Did we do a little? Oh, we did. We, we played

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in there. Like you were like, all right, let's

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go. Let's go. Let's go. I'm like, yes, that's

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how she works. I love that. I love that. So grateful,

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beautiful and brilliant. So, all right, everyone,

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I'm so excited for you to meet Becky because

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what she does is so unique. So give us a whole

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story. Tell us who you are, what you do, and

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why. I'm just so fascinated with you. I'm going

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to sit back and relax and enjoy. Take over the

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show. Tell us all about it. Well, I'm Becky Sampson.

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Um, and I am the founder and owner CEO of, um,

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a company called only subpoenas. So there's a

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backstory of why I do subpoenas for attorneys.

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I do them for attorneys. However, I really specialize

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in doing them for divorce attorneys. So I, um,

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got married back in 2018, um, ended up going

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to Hawaii on my, on my honeymoon for a month.

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This is my second marriage, by the way. And,

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um, And while we were there, my former husband

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now ended up getting a job. And so we ended up

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moving to Hawaii. Well, during the process of

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moving to Hawaii, within four months, he had

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threatened divorce and I had moved all of my

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life there. I'd packed everything up, went to

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an island where I only knew two people and started

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a TV show. And then Like I said, four months

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later, he wanted me to sign a false or fraudulent

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tax return. And I said, I don't do that. And

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10 minutes later, he told me that he wanted to

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divorce and he wanted to divorce fast. Um, and

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then the very next day I kind of sat down with

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him and I'm like, okay, I tell me what is really

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so wrong in this relationship that it needs to

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go to divorce so quickly. And he's turned to

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me with all seriousness, In his voice, um, and

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said the best thing he could have ever said to

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me, which was, um, I'm having a really hard time

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seeing the value that you bring to my life. And

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I was like, wow. So here's the good news. I know

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the value that I bring to your life, whether

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you choose to see it or not is none of my business.

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And, uh, that started a journey. Seven months

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later, I served him divorce papers. at the airport

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on the way off the island. Um, on April 1st,

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which I did not mean to do it that day. It just

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so happened that the whole world was shutting

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down and the airport was about to shut down.

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So on April Fool's day, I served him divorce

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papers and three and a half years later through

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a court system, which I had no clue how to navigate.

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Um, I represented myself. for most of it up against

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five attorneys, 21 subpoenas, 21 hearings. Um,

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and I was successful. So I, you know, I've always

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had this real soft spot in my heart for people

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who are going through divorce, especially now,

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because my first divorce was nothing. Like it

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was, it was like we signed the papers. We didn't

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even see the judge. Everything was agreed upon

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and we left. Whereas this one I had to learn

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from nothing to where I am now, which my nickname

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is Becky Brockovich, if that tells you anything.

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I'm just I'm just a researcher and I learned

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everything I possibly could about the legal system.

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And I am not an attorney. I don't act like an

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attorney on podcasts. So, however, I do. I'm

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really about empowering people. With the right

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information as you're going through a divorce,

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most people don't take educational classes on

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how to get divorced and how to get divorced strong.

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So I call it divorce strong or the strong method,

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um, on how to navigate that. So you can have

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a fair and equitable division because 44 % of

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women coming out of divorce end up in poverty.

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And I get it. I totally, I fought for it. everything

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that I possibly could. I'm not for fighting for

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more than what's yours, but you've got to know

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what your rights are so that you can make an

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educated decision out of a divorce and really

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end up financially strong, emotionally strong,

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spiritually strong, because that's really how,

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how I personally, it was a journey. It was a

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journey. Um, but I feel like I came through that

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and I am happily now married for the third time

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and last. So Um, and he's the one that's really

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encouraging me to do this business. Cause he's

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just like, Becky, you've got to help people.

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You just got to help people. I have a bunch of

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questions for you, but I can't help. But like

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my burning question is, um, is what a TV show,

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what, like what? So you got a job like what?

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How did I do that? Yeah. What kind of TV show?

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Cause I mean, you're so beautiful. I'm thinking

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actress actor delivering the news. Oh no. You're,

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you're so cute. So I have always been a networker

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my whole entire life. So when I, so 15 years

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ago, I ended up losing 130 pounds. And I think

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I discussed this with you the other day that

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I was like, I never thought it was beautiful

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ever. Like I came from a very attractive family,

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but I was not the beautiful one. And so when

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I lost all that weight towards the last part

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of my first marriage, I was like, Oh my gosh,

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like, wow. And the world related to me differently.

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Now men treated me differently. And in that process

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of being treated differently, I would sit in

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front of the mirror just going, okay, what, like,

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who am I now? Where's my identity? I'm still

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the same person. I just have a different body.

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I carry myself differently. So I have a different

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response from other people. So at that point,

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when I hit my goal weight, got divorced and quit

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my job all in the same month of July, 2010, I

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didn't know what I was going to do. So I reached

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out to this one gal that I saw was on TV. And

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I reached out to her. I'm like, Hey, would you

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be interested in my story at all? And she's like,

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well, I, I don't know if I have a lot of influence

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TV wise, but I can put you on radio. So I ended

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up running her radio show for two and a half

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years. And this was actually go into a studio

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into a little box in a room with a window. And

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there was a lady that was running the show and

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I would talk to a microphone for two hours. Like

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I, I, I literally cried the first show. Cause

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I'm like, what am I going to talk about? No.

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And, um, anyway, that went on to me doing a lot

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of different podcasts. Internet radio before

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podcasts was even a thing. Um, and then when

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I went to Hawaii, I, I knew nobody, I literally

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knew two people on the island. That's it. And

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so within a week, I looked up all these networking

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things and I went out and I went to one networking

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event and this guy's like, Hey, you'd be great

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for TV. Why don't you start? this, it's a community

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TV show. And I thought, well, that's great. That

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will give me, that will force me to get out into

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the community and start meeting people and start

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interviewing them. So yeah, I did, I think at

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12 episodes of that, all while I was still, I

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was a full -time student actually in college

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too. I enrolled, um, for peace building and mediation

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and all of that conflict resolution stuff. So,

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uh, yeah, I loved it. Oh my gosh. So what you,

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what you went to school for literally ties into

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what you're doing now. Okay. Thank you for that

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story. Yes. Because so the TV show happened first.

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And then one of the things that my former husband

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had was free education with his job. And so he's

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like, well, Becky, why don't we finish your education?

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Well, I started in business. And then, um, when

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I was going through this divorce and I was doing

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so much work, Um, in the legal system for myself,

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I was representing myself. I switched it to peace

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building and because that was more, I've been

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a life coach for many, many years. And I'm like,

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I'm all about creating peace, but I found myself

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in one of the. The highest conflict issues and

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relationships of my life. And, um, it was interesting

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because there was times where I was going to

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court and I was going to have to, you know, represent

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myself or send an email to the lawyer. And next

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thing I know, I'm going to class going, okay,

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you have to be peaceful. You have to like your

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language matters. And I was like, Oh, okay. So

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even one time I was walking down, um, Honolulu,

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giving some papers to the attorney and I was

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listening to this book called the, it's called

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anatomy of peace. And it was talking about having

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a heart of war or a heart of peace. And I was

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just like, okay, my heart was definitely a heart

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of war at that point. And so I walked myself

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down to the ABC store and I got a big bag of

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chocolates and I delivered it with my papers

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to that attorney. That attorney ended up emailing

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me and going, was that you, Becky? Did you leave

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those? And I truly believe that that was a turning

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point in my case with my former husband's attorney,

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where I had to soften my heart because I knew

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I wasn't going to win the war with that kind

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of heart. And so that's even though We use subpoenas

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to uncover, for me personally, I help people

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uncover hidden assets so that they can have a

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fair and equitable division in it, but you can

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still be peaceful. It really, that's just something

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that's so important to me is to be able to teach

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people to do it in a peaceful way and to keep

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your heart soft towards that person that you

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may be in high conflict with. That's a challenge.

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Amazing. Okay. First of all, for your LinkedIn,

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I see this. So if you go onto like Canva with

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quote, I had to soften my heart in order to win

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the war. I'm Becky Sampson. That is a great quote.

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Yeah. Yeah. It's really a beautiful quote. Okay.

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So I don't recall ever. I don't think I ever

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was served a subpoena. So for my friends out

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there that have never been served a subpoena

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and maybe like I used to watch like Bounty Hunter

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and you know like the TV shows where you've been

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served and then they run away. Yeah. So for anyone

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who doesn't really understand what a subpoena

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is and the importance of it, like, Oh, just a

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subpoena. Like what difference is just telling

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me that I'm being subpoenaed that I have to go

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to court or a deposition or whatever that looks

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like. So what, but I would love for you to really

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explain what a subpoena is and then the importance

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of it and what you do, how that matters. Well,

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so here's the thing is when you're, when you're

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going through, when you get married, It's a financial

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transaction. Most people don't even think about

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that, right? And I'm actually not for divorce.

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I'm telling you, I love marriage. I believe in

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the sanction of marriage. However, when you're

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put in a situation where you know that it's inevitable

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and you're getting divorced, there's all kinds

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of stuff that happens. One of the things that's

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very, very common is one or the other person

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will hide assets or they'll, you know, pull money

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out of the bank, they'll put it in just another

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bank account. There's all kinds of shenanigans

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that go on. Um, and one of the reasons I honestly,

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that my husband now is encouraging me to do this,

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he was left with 21 cents after 27 and a half

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year marriage, his wife left him with 21 cents

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in the bank. And I know that because I've seen

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it and I've done the forensics, the financial

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forensics to know what was going on. Um, but

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So when I'm, you know, I also does divorce strategist

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and during that I use the subpoenas as a strategy.

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Okay. It's a strategy to be able to uncover,

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um, uncover the assets that are trying to be

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hidden from the courts. And so it's not something

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like to go after someone, but a subpoena is basically

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a court order. I'm not an attorney by the way.

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It is a court order ordering whatever organization,

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bank, school, counselor, whatever information

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that you need, it's a signed thing from the court

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order or from an attorney saying, hey, within

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two weeks or whatever, you need to be able to

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produce that kind of paperwork or that statement,

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or I need you to come to court to represent me.

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And yes, there's a process with that subpoenas.

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However, because I'm not a licensed attorney,

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I don't do them for pro se people. I do them

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for attorneys. So it's all done through attorneys.

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And some people come to me that have an attorney

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and will end up hiring me to do the subpoenas

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through their attorney. I can direct them to

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resources and all kinds of things throughout

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the United States to be able to figure out out

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on their own because I had to figure out on my

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own and actually it was because I was working

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with a post well he was in it he was with legal

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aid but he didn't have time to take my case so

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he just mentored me and the only reason I learned

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how to do this subpoena was because they had

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subpoenaed me once and he goes well there you

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go there is your template. you know what to do.

00:14:03.750 --> 00:14:08.850
So I, and I, I wasted eight months in my case,

00:14:08.850 --> 00:14:12.870
um, asking for discovery because you know, you

00:14:12.870 --> 00:14:15.629
do a discovery that they don't provide the information.

00:14:15.669 --> 00:14:18.509
Then you have to go back with emotion to compel

00:14:18.509 --> 00:14:21.330
in the court system. And then they go, well,

00:14:21.409 --> 00:14:22.970
you need to give her that information. Then they

00:14:22.970 --> 00:14:24.870
don't give it to you. I'm like, stop asking for

00:14:24.870 --> 00:14:29.419
permission and go subpoena it. But You know if

00:14:29.419 --> 00:14:32.159
i talk to somebody if they come to me in there

00:14:32.159 --> 00:14:35.039
they're just barely getting the starting the

00:14:35.039 --> 00:14:36.600
process before they even get divorced there's

00:14:36.600 --> 00:14:39.639
things that they can do to alleviate having to

00:14:39.639 --> 00:14:43.700
do the subpoena. Which really will help them

00:14:43.700 --> 00:14:46.399
gather the information so that they can have

00:14:46.399 --> 00:14:48.799
you know even ground ability okay this is what

00:14:48.799 --> 00:14:50.919
i'm negotiating because if you don't know the

00:14:50.919 --> 00:14:53.690
information then how do you negotiate. And oftentimes

00:14:53.690 --> 00:14:56.529
the court systems will push them to mediation.

00:14:56.549 --> 00:14:58.590
Well, you need all the information and mediation.

00:14:59.289 --> 00:15:01.750
So that was my problem is, is that we couldn't

00:15:01.750 --> 00:15:04.450
mediate because I'm like, where's the financials?

00:15:04.509 --> 00:15:06.950
Where's all the information? And I truly, truly

00:15:06.950 --> 00:15:11.210
believe and know that the reason why the settlement,

00:15:11.210 --> 00:15:13.950
um, I was offered the settlement that I was,

00:15:14.070 --> 00:15:16.549
was because all the information was on the table.

00:15:16.929 --> 00:15:19.330
I had discovered and put all the information

00:15:19.330 --> 00:15:21.279
out there. I just want to process this for a

00:15:21.279 --> 00:15:22.779
second because I got to get this in my head.

00:15:22.840 --> 00:15:25.620
I was thinking you subpoena a person to show

00:15:25.620 --> 00:15:28.600
up, like you said, but it's also subpoena to

00:15:28.600 --> 00:15:33.340
get information. So then that subpoena, so is

00:15:33.340 --> 00:15:35.679
it like you want to have like one subpoena that

00:15:35.679 --> 00:15:39.580
has all that information? No, so like a bank

00:15:39.580 --> 00:15:41.759
account, that's one subpoena. Then another bank

00:15:41.759 --> 00:15:44.950
account would be another subpoena. And, and oftentimes

00:15:44.950 --> 00:15:47.769
people also don't know that you can, you don't

00:15:47.769 --> 00:15:50.649
have to have the account number to subpoena.

00:15:50.809 --> 00:15:55.269
So it's, uh, there's a subpoena though, the bank

00:15:55.269 --> 00:15:59.289
or the person who's getting, you can subpoena

00:15:59.289 --> 00:16:04.450
just about anybody but the IRS. That's funny

00:16:04.450 --> 00:16:06.490
though. Yeah. So if there's information that's

00:16:06.490 --> 00:16:09.409
being withheld or that's not being given to you

00:16:09.409 --> 00:16:12.750
during your divorce case, um, you can subpoena.

00:16:12.960 --> 00:16:16.120
And you don't have to have an attorney to subpoena.

00:16:16.220 --> 00:16:18.620
That's another thing that people don't know.

00:16:18.659 --> 00:16:21.539
Say that again. That's crazy. Yeah. You don't

00:16:21.539 --> 00:16:25.759
have to. I did all 21 subpoenas in my case without

00:16:25.759 --> 00:16:29.440
an attorney. So once I learned how to do it,

00:16:29.700 --> 00:16:32.419
then I did that for myself. And I remember when

00:16:32.419 --> 00:16:34.580
I finally turned my case over to the attorney

00:16:34.580 --> 00:16:37.519
that, that I had for a while, he's like, Becky,

00:16:37.639 --> 00:16:40.440
how in the world with you not being an attorney,

00:16:40.600 --> 00:16:42.909
did you get all these people to respond? And

00:16:42.909 --> 00:16:45.090
I'm like, well, I couldn't afford not to get

00:16:45.090 --> 00:16:48.110
them to respond. So that's one of the things

00:16:48.110 --> 00:16:50.289
too, that I've also recognized. And the reason

00:16:50.289 --> 00:16:55.210
why I even started this business is because attorneys

00:16:55.210 --> 00:16:58.110
don't have the time to do the due diligence,

00:16:58.110 --> 00:17:00.629
to make sure that those subpoenas are done correctly.

00:17:01.269 --> 00:17:04.150
I mean, some do and the paralegal, you know,

00:17:04.210 --> 00:17:06.150
we recently, I'll tell you a story real quick.

00:17:06.529 --> 00:17:08.970
We recently had a court case last year and we

00:17:08.970 --> 00:17:13.809
were getting ready for a uh, trial. And my husband

00:17:13.809 --> 00:17:15.390
comes to me and he says, you know, we need to

00:17:15.390 --> 00:17:19.769
subpoena this person. And we called the attorney,

00:17:19.829 --> 00:17:21.849
this attorney has been like 35 year attorneys,

00:17:21.849 --> 00:17:24.869
you know, he'd been around the block while. And

00:17:24.869 --> 00:17:27.710
I said, so my husband wants to subpoena this,

00:17:27.829 --> 00:17:29.230
these people. And he's like, no, I don't want

00:17:29.230 --> 00:17:32.109
to do that. And I was like, no, no, no. You don't

00:17:32.109 --> 00:17:36.049
understand. My husband wants to subpoena this

00:17:36.049 --> 00:17:39.220
because this is going to show this, right? to

00:17:39.220 --> 00:17:41.160
the judge because that's basically what you're

00:17:41.160 --> 00:17:43.599
doing is you're getting information for the judge.

00:17:44.400 --> 00:17:47.380
And then finally our attorney was like, okay,

00:17:47.640 --> 00:17:50.359
well fine. I'll charge you $500. And I was like,

00:17:50.579 --> 00:17:55.759
for what? You know, and, um, and my husband's

00:17:55.759 --> 00:17:58.599
like, I don't care. We need to do that. So we

00:17:58.599 --> 00:18:02.200
went ahead and did that. And, um, within 45 minutes

00:18:02.200 --> 00:18:04.579
I get off the phone with them. go do my due diligence

00:18:04.579 --> 00:18:06.539
like I always do with subpoenas because I'm very,

00:18:06.539 --> 00:18:11.380
very thorough. I call her back and I talk to

00:18:11.380 --> 00:18:13.839
the paralegal and she's like, she's been 18 years

00:18:13.839 --> 00:18:16.839
paralegal. And she goes, no, no, Becky, no problem.

00:18:16.859 --> 00:18:18.779
I already sent the subpoena off to the bank.

00:18:18.880 --> 00:18:22.319
It's been rejected. And I was like, did you do

00:18:22.319 --> 00:18:24.880
this, this, this and this? And she goes, how

00:18:24.880 --> 00:18:28.279
do you know? I said, honey, this is what I do.

00:18:29.460 --> 00:18:32.119
And, uh, so sure enough, I sent her the instructions

00:18:32.119 --> 00:18:33.859
tonight with all the stuff that needs to be done.

00:18:33.859 --> 00:18:35.519
And she sent it off and it went right through.

00:18:36.279 --> 00:18:40.960
So it's important. So subpoenas are just very

00:18:40.960 --> 00:18:46.240
specific. Um, and that is my specialty. That's

00:18:46.240 --> 00:18:49.920
my superpower. And, uh, so I support people going

00:18:49.920 --> 00:18:54.160
through divorce as well as, um, the attorneys,

00:18:54.220 --> 00:18:56.019
but here's the other thing that came to me a

00:18:56.019 --> 00:19:00.940
couple of weeks ago is that. If 44 % of women,

00:19:01.079 --> 00:19:03.900
now this happens to men too, 44 % of women end

00:19:03.900 --> 00:19:07.380
up in poverty. I was left with nothing on an

00:19:07.380 --> 00:19:11.640
island in the middle of nowhere financially.

00:19:11.759 --> 00:19:16.500
And I had to fight like crazy to be able to,

00:19:17.859 --> 00:19:19.819
I applied for 45 different jobs and didn't get

00:19:19.819 --> 00:19:23.339
a job other than a college that I was going to

00:19:23.339 --> 00:19:26.700
was willing to pay me $10 to $12 an hour to do

00:19:26.700 --> 00:19:30.890
their podcasting. And that's all I could get.

00:19:31.430 --> 00:19:35.789
And so I also am providing with the only subpoenas

00:19:35.789 --> 00:19:38.690
company, I'm providing opportunity for employment

00:19:38.690 --> 00:19:42.970
for people coming out of divorce. Oh, that way.

00:19:43.009 --> 00:19:44.769
I want to hear more about that. I want to understand

00:19:44.769 --> 00:19:47.450
something though. So the old idea that you've

00:19:47.450 --> 00:19:50.950
been served, but obviously the subpoena could

00:19:50.950 --> 00:19:55.789
also go via email. It totally depends on how,

00:19:56.029 --> 00:19:58.069
it totally depends. Every single organization,

00:19:58.490 --> 00:20:00.289
every single bank, this is the reason why it's

00:20:00.289 --> 00:20:03.369
tough for attorneys because you have to get it

00:20:03.369 --> 00:20:08.869
correctly for that organization. So if one organization

00:20:08.869 --> 00:20:11.190
may say, hey, just email it now, that's not normal.

00:20:11.559 --> 00:20:14.500
That's not a normal way of doing it, but they

00:20:14.500 --> 00:20:17.460
may take it through email or they may take it

00:20:17.460 --> 00:20:19.519
through certified mail. They may take it through

00:20:19.519 --> 00:20:22.259
being served, like actually paying somebody to

00:20:22.259 --> 00:20:29.480
serve. That's a totally different way of being

00:20:29.480 --> 00:20:33.299
served. So it's just, it's a little tedious and

00:20:33.299 --> 00:20:36.200
that's the reason why you've got to do it correctly

00:20:36.200 --> 00:20:38.140
or else you waste a lot of time and a lot of

00:20:38.140 --> 00:20:41.259
money and those subpoenas may come back. And

00:20:41.259 --> 00:20:42.920
you may have to do it all over again, which is

00:20:42.920 --> 00:20:49.819
more costly. Bring me the dog. You've got the

00:20:49.819 --> 00:20:52.259
dog. So, yeah, so there's a lot of different

00:20:52.259 --> 00:20:55.599
ways. And again, it's a strategy. It's it's literally

00:20:55.599 --> 00:20:57.799
helping the disadvantaged because one of the

00:20:57.799 --> 00:20:59.839
things my husband, I love what he keeps saying

00:20:59.839 --> 00:21:02.619
to me is, is that, Becky, your business helps

00:21:02.619 --> 00:21:06.920
the disadvantaged, the people who are that don't

00:21:06.920 --> 00:21:09.019
even know what they don't know. They don't know

00:21:09.019 --> 00:21:11.750
that they can get the information. Um, they don't

00:21:11.750 --> 00:21:14.890
know that they can, um, stand up for what their

00:21:14.890 --> 00:21:17.670
rights are. But what, like I always say, is that

00:21:17.670 --> 00:21:19.190
if you don't know your rights, then you don't

00:21:19.190 --> 00:21:23.670
have any rights. And so super important. And

00:21:23.670 --> 00:21:25.990
that's, that's really what I teach is I help,

00:21:25.990 --> 00:21:29.230
you know, navigate and direct people to where

00:21:29.230 --> 00:21:31.109
they can find out where their rights are for

00:21:31.109 --> 00:21:33.529
each state. Cause it is different. The jurisdictions

00:21:33.529 --> 00:21:38.059
are different. Sorry, the dog is barking. Okay.

00:21:39.920 --> 00:21:44.299
So, okay. Thank you. Just give me the dog. Sorry

00:21:44.299 --> 00:21:48.039
guys. It is live. So stay here. I love this live

00:21:48.039 --> 00:21:50.900
stuff. Imperfectly perfect. That's how I do it.

00:21:51.119 --> 00:21:53.299
Perfect. All of a sudden the guys like control

00:21:53.299 --> 00:21:56.559
says knock it off. Okay. I'm sorry. He's a bad

00:21:56.559 --> 00:22:00.759
boy. He just, okay. So hopefully that doesn't

00:22:00.759 --> 00:22:02.500
bother. It's not going to bother anyone. Okay.

00:22:02.619 --> 00:22:05.460
That was a lot of information to, to process.

00:22:05.700 --> 00:22:08.920
So what would have happened? What would have

00:22:08.920 --> 00:22:10.380
happened if you didn't ask her those questions?

00:22:10.420 --> 00:22:12.160
And you, it's me and I don't know if she comes

00:22:12.160 --> 00:22:15.400
back to me and she tells me, Oh, it has been

00:22:15.400 --> 00:22:18.599
rejected. Then what would happen? You mean with

00:22:18.599 --> 00:22:21.559
the subpoena, if you've, well, the reasons why

00:22:21.559 --> 00:22:25.940
it's been, it's it is rejected. Whether it was

00:22:25.940 --> 00:22:29.839
done incorrectly, the verbiage, it was too...

00:22:29.839 --> 00:22:32.359
That's the thing is that instead of trying to

00:22:32.359 --> 00:22:36.900
figure out how the subpoenas work, I happened

00:22:36.900 --> 00:22:40.140
to do it because there was no other choice that

00:22:40.140 --> 00:22:42.019
I had. I didn't have the money to pay someone

00:22:42.019 --> 00:22:49.960
to do it and I didn't know what I didn't know

00:22:49.960 --> 00:22:54.579
at the time. And so, It gets a little complicated

00:22:54.579 --> 00:22:58.140
because the penis, that's the reason why I do

00:22:58.140 --> 00:22:59.759
it for the attorneys. I just got the phone with

00:22:59.759 --> 00:23:02.339
an attorney today that's been another 36 years.

00:23:02.700 --> 00:23:04.480
And she's like, Oh, Becky, this and that. I said,

00:23:04.579 --> 00:23:07.079
no, that's the reason why I do it. Like just,

00:23:07.119 --> 00:23:09.160
you know, so we're going to start working with

00:23:09.160 --> 00:23:12.400
together hopefully. And, um, and she won't have

00:23:12.400 --> 00:23:14.839
to worry about that. I think I asked the question

00:23:14.839 --> 00:23:18.059
wrong, Becky. I definitely asked it wrong. What

00:23:18.059 --> 00:23:20.619
would have happened if you're not Becky? It's

00:23:20.619 --> 00:23:24.369
Adrian Barker. I'm doing this. The paralegal

00:23:24.369 --> 00:23:26.589
says, oh, I'm sorry. The information you want,

00:23:26.730 --> 00:23:31.029
the bank rejected it. Then like what am I? Because

00:23:31.029 --> 00:23:34.269
I think I can hear myself going, oh, that's OK.

00:23:34.750 --> 00:23:36.509
That's too bad. Or how's that going to affect

00:23:36.509 --> 00:23:39.049
my case? I don't know if I would fight to say,

00:23:39.329 --> 00:23:42.269
wait a second. What did you like? I wouldn't

00:23:42.269 --> 00:23:44.109
know what to do. So for all our friends out there,

00:23:44.170 --> 00:23:46.730
the three of them, what how can they actually

00:23:46.730 --> 00:23:50.420
make sure that is getting like. Like what if

00:23:50.420 --> 00:23:52.140
that happens to them? They're told, Oh no, it

00:23:52.140 --> 00:23:54.480
got rejected. Is it just, let's move on to the

00:23:54.480 --> 00:23:56.960
next thing. Okay. You bring up a really, really

00:23:56.960 --> 00:23:59.700
good point. If somebody is working with an attorney

00:23:59.700 --> 00:24:03.259
and an attorney, so attorney, especially divorce

00:24:03.259 --> 00:24:07.440
attorneys are very, very busy and they're dealing

00:24:07.440 --> 00:24:10.460
with a high conflict, typically high conflict

00:24:10.460 --> 00:24:14.210
divorces. And so, um, or they can be, I should

00:24:14.210 --> 00:24:16.509
say. There are some people that specialize in,

00:24:16.509 --> 00:24:19.289
you know, no conflict, divorce, whatever. So

00:24:19.289 --> 00:24:20.930
they're under a lot of pressure and they have

00:24:20.930 --> 00:24:24.750
a lot of things on their plate. Um, and so, however,

00:24:24.970 --> 00:24:27.829
they do work for you, right? When you hire an

00:24:27.829 --> 00:24:30.549
attorney, one of the things I'm about to write

00:24:30.549 --> 00:24:34.150
an article called don't marry the first attorney

00:24:34.150 --> 00:24:42.960
you meet. Don't don't marry the first divorce

00:24:42.960 --> 00:24:47.900
attorney you meet Because it is it's this is

00:24:47.900 --> 00:24:51.740
one of the most important Relationships that

00:24:51.740 --> 00:24:53.619
you're gonna have especially when you're dealing

00:24:53.619 --> 00:24:56.079
with a high comp I can't even tell you how many

00:24:56.079 --> 00:24:59.859
people come to me and say I Can't say my attorney.

00:24:59.940 --> 00:25:01.940
They're not doing the right thing. They're not

00:25:01.940 --> 00:25:07.539
You know and so just gently remind them. Hey,

00:25:07.539 --> 00:25:11.670
you know They work for you you do not work for

00:25:11.670 --> 00:25:14.289
them so let's say that that situation comes up

00:25:14.289 --> 00:25:16.549
and they come back and said hey it's been rejected

00:25:16.549 --> 00:25:20.089
what are our options what do we need to do. You

00:25:20.089 --> 00:25:24.309
know because very few times would they be rejecting

00:25:24.309 --> 00:25:26.730
the problem is that they have to start all over

00:25:26.730 --> 00:25:29.269
again and do it again and they usually don't

00:25:29.269 --> 00:25:31.009
have the time or is there something that i can

00:25:31.009 --> 00:25:33.990
help you with so that we can make sure it gets

00:25:33.990 --> 00:25:36.069
through. because we need that information in

00:25:36.069 --> 00:25:38.630
order to go to trial or to go to a mediation

00:25:38.630 --> 00:25:42.190
or to whatever it is. Don't just say, no, just

00:25:42.190 --> 00:25:47.910
take no for no, you know, that's just means a

00:25:47.910 --> 00:25:50.230
that may mean I'm too busy and I don't want to

00:25:50.230 --> 00:25:52.069
do it. I don't, I don't want to mess with it.

00:25:52.150 --> 00:25:55.890
And my experience of attorneys is, is that they're,

00:25:56.009 --> 00:25:59.769
they're very busy and, and subpoenas are kind

00:25:59.769 --> 00:26:03.069
of one of those things that you have to be careful

00:26:03.069 --> 00:26:04.890
and sometimes they don't have the attention and

00:26:04.890 --> 00:26:09.269
the time to it. And that's the reason why, you

00:26:09.269 --> 00:26:11.329
know, my company is going to be, you know, taking

00:26:11.329 --> 00:26:13.549
that pressure off of them so they can win more

00:26:13.549 --> 00:26:15.490
cases and have the information that they need

00:26:15.490 --> 00:26:18.710
and they don't have to mess with it. But advocate

00:26:18.710 --> 00:26:21.690
for yourself. I wouldn't even know to advocate

00:26:21.690 --> 00:26:24.509
for myself. No, that's listen to this podcast.

00:26:24.990 --> 00:26:27.769
Most people would and this is this applies to

00:26:27.769 --> 00:26:31.670
any case through the court system. I mean, I

00:26:31.670 --> 00:26:36.329
didn't know that I had half of the rights that

00:26:36.329 --> 00:26:38.450
I did, right? Like I had a gal come to me the

00:26:38.450 --> 00:26:42.529
other day, she did not have an attorney. And

00:26:42.529 --> 00:26:44.829
when, so talk about strategy, she was, somebody

00:26:44.829 --> 00:26:47.490
had referred her to me and we had a conversation

00:26:47.490 --> 00:26:50.390
and she was... trying to look for an attorney,

00:26:50.410 --> 00:26:51.890
but she didn't have one yet. And I said, that's

00:26:51.890 --> 00:26:53.369
fine. You know, here's some things that you may

00:26:53.369 --> 00:26:56.190
want to consider before you go. And then I called

00:26:56.190 --> 00:26:58.569
back later and she got an attorney and she goes,

00:26:58.809 --> 00:27:01.230
Oh yeah, Becky, I got this attorney. And it's

00:27:01.230 --> 00:27:03.089
great news because this attorney is best friends

00:27:03.089 --> 00:27:05.210
with my husband's attorney. I think they're going

00:27:05.210 --> 00:27:07.710
to be able to work it out and everything. And,

00:27:07.990 --> 00:27:10.349
and, and she said to me that I needed to choose

00:27:10.349 --> 00:27:17.230
between alimony and, um, alimony in half of the,

00:27:17.710 --> 00:27:20.740
our business. So I have to choose from one of

00:27:20.740 --> 00:27:22.859
them instead of both of them. And I said to her,

00:27:22.900 --> 00:27:25.000
I said, look, I'm not an attorney. I can't give

00:27:25.000 --> 00:27:29.900
you legal advice. Here's a resource that you

00:27:29.900 --> 00:27:34.960
may want to go and research. But I know that

00:27:34.960 --> 00:27:38.859
those two issues are completely dealt with separately

00:27:38.859 --> 00:27:43.099
in the court system. So it's not an or it's an

00:27:43.099 --> 00:27:48.119
and. And her attorney didn't have the time nor

00:27:48.119 --> 00:27:51.920
put her best interest at hand to be able to explain

00:27:51.920 --> 00:27:56.619
to her that she's entitled to both. So I had,

00:27:57.000 --> 00:27:59.839
at that point I thought, oh my gosh, this is

00:27:59.839 --> 00:28:01.980
what happens in the legal system is that when

00:28:01.980 --> 00:28:04.799
we hire an attorney, we think that our jobs over,

00:28:04.839 --> 00:28:06.859
I mean, we're done advocating for ourselves.

00:28:07.759 --> 00:28:10.799
But no, that's not true. That's just, that's

00:28:10.799 --> 00:28:13.119
yes. Can they go fight for you in the court and

00:28:13.119 --> 00:28:15.359
can they, but, but you still need to advocate

00:28:15.359 --> 00:28:17.960
and go find out what your rights are. And an

00:28:17.960 --> 00:28:20.200
attorney, an ex attorney, I should say, I had

00:28:20.200 --> 00:28:22.000
a conversation with yesterday. She's, she's having

00:28:22.000 --> 00:28:24.940
the same experience. She's like, she helps people

00:28:24.940 --> 00:28:27.640
with pro se divorces. And she's like, Becky,

00:28:27.779 --> 00:28:30.559
they just don't know what they don't know. Like

00:28:30.559 --> 00:28:34.519
I know. And it will cost them a lot of money.

00:28:34.660 --> 00:28:37.230
It will cost you a lot of money. I love what

00:28:37.230 --> 00:28:40.410
you're doing. I think this is so important. The,

00:28:40.410 --> 00:28:42.569
uh, the subpoenas. So wait, so is your business

00:28:42.569 --> 00:28:46.049
ready to take business? Yeah. Yep. So you're

00:28:46.049 --> 00:28:49.130
ready. So yeah, I have two different types. I've

00:28:49.130 --> 00:28:50.650
been, one of them is the only subpoenas, which

00:28:50.650 --> 00:28:52.710
is awesome because the only subpoenas is going

00:28:52.710 --> 00:28:55.690
to, we're going to be, um, hiring stay at home

00:28:55.690 --> 00:28:58.470
moms. Cause I really believe it's an important

00:28:58.470 --> 00:29:00.509
place for moms to be. And I want to be able to

00:29:00.509 --> 00:29:03.170
empower them financially. So they will be working

00:29:03.170 --> 00:29:05.619
since it's a virtual. You can be anywhere in

00:29:05.619 --> 00:29:08.279
the country. Um, also people coming out of divorce

00:29:08.279 --> 00:29:11.599
that need an income like me, like I could not

00:29:11.599 --> 00:29:15.640
get an income. Um, but they can work for my,

00:29:15.640 --> 00:29:17.980
not only subpoenas, but then on the other side

00:29:17.980 --> 00:29:21.619
is my coaching where I do strategy and support

00:29:21.619 --> 00:29:24.700
groups. And I'm starting, um, divorce camps,

00:29:25.000 --> 00:29:27.240
which is cause I grew up at camps my whole life.

00:29:27.240 --> 00:29:29.859
So I'm like, bring them to nature, help them

00:29:29.859 --> 00:29:34.000
heal, help them strategize and just come through.

00:29:34.830 --> 00:29:37.450
I just, my biggest thing is to be able to tell

00:29:37.450 --> 00:29:41.589
people there is hope after divorce. You're going

00:29:41.589 --> 00:29:44.650
to be okay. This is just temporary. It doesn't

00:29:44.650 --> 00:29:49.170
feel like it right now, but yeah. I love that.

00:29:49.329 --> 00:29:53.089
Okay. So, um, so first of all, the website is

00:29:53.089 --> 00:29:56.910
only subpoenas only subpoenas .com. Okay. So

00:29:56.910 --> 00:30:00.170
we got that on the thing. All right. So, so are

00:30:00.170 --> 00:30:03.319
you Are you OK to like pitch? So if there is

00:30:03.319 --> 00:30:05.500
an attorney watching or I will definitely have

00:30:05.500 --> 00:30:09.019
a focus to get this in front of attorneys, what

00:30:09.019 --> 00:30:11.359
does the pitch look like? How are you selling

00:30:11.359 --> 00:30:16.500
yourself to an attorney? Honestly, it my job

00:30:16.500 --> 00:30:21.759
is to make it easier for the attorney. Not only

00:30:21.759 --> 00:30:23.759
with their clients that are going through divorce,

00:30:23.920 --> 00:30:25.480
because I'll help them on the emotional side

00:30:25.480 --> 00:30:28.079
in preparing them all their documents and things

00:30:28.079 --> 00:30:30.319
like that for the attorney, because I realize

00:30:30.319 --> 00:30:34.019
the attorneys again are way overworked, right?

00:30:34.420 --> 00:30:38.259
So if I can get them doing more subpoenas and

00:30:38.259 --> 00:30:40.960
make it a really easy and seamless, you know,

00:30:41.019 --> 00:30:43.660
it takes 10, 15 minutes of their of their time

00:30:43.660 --> 00:30:45.900
to fill out all the information into the website.

00:30:45.900 --> 00:30:48.119
And we're going to. Do all the prep work, all

00:30:48.119 --> 00:30:51.759
the serving work, all the compliance work on

00:30:51.759 --> 00:30:54.660
that. It makes it super easy for them. Plus it's

00:30:54.660 --> 00:30:56.880
a free fee for them because it goes, they just

00:30:56.880 --> 00:31:00.859
pass that fee onto their client and my fees are

00:31:00.859 --> 00:31:04.819
fairly, fairly low. So, um, because of my situation,

00:31:04.819 --> 00:31:07.339
I want to be able to make it easy for other people.

00:31:07.759 --> 00:31:10.900
So yeah, that's my pitch for the attorneys, for

00:31:10.900 --> 00:31:12.579
the attorneys. Also, if they want me to work

00:31:12.579 --> 00:31:16.180
with their clients, on the coaching side of it,

00:31:16.380 --> 00:31:18.740
I'm, I'm happy to do that as well. Cause that's

00:31:18.740 --> 00:31:20.859
going to take some pressure off of them. I know

00:31:20.859 --> 00:31:22.720
the first time I met with an attorney during

00:31:22.720 --> 00:31:25.720
my divorce, I cried for an hour and a half and

00:31:25.720 --> 00:31:31.039
each sent sent me a bill for $365. I just realized

00:31:31.039 --> 00:31:32.819
I'm like, that's the last time I'm going to do

00:31:32.819 --> 00:31:36.579
that because attorneys will charge you whether

00:31:36.579 --> 00:31:39.529
or not they do anything for you or not. And that's

00:31:39.529 --> 00:31:41.670
just not, they just don't want the emotion to

00:31:41.670 --> 00:31:44.089
come. They want the facts. They want the figures

00:31:44.089 --> 00:31:46.789
and they want to be able to be able to quickly

00:31:46.789 --> 00:31:49.869
help you navigate through that. So taking all

00:31:49.869 --> 00:31:52.670
your emotions and stuff. That's what I also have

00:31:52.670 --> 00:31:55.430
support for too. So it, it really both businesses,

00:31:55.430 --> 00:31:59.750
um, feed each other. I love it. I, I think you're

00:31:59.750 --> 00:32:01.809
going to have a very successful business. I think

00:32:01.809 --> 00:32:05.269
it's going to be a rolling in. Yeah. Why attorney's

00:32:05.269 --> 00:32:07.849
out there seriously. And why wouldn't you want

00:32:07.849 --> 00:32:11.720
to on your team. I mean, I would want Becky on

00:32:11.720 --> 00:32:15.160
my team. Becky is, so you're on their team, but

00:32:15.160 --> 00:32:17.400
which was a tagline I use now on their payroll,

00:32:17.660 --> 00:32:22.140
right? I love that. You can use it. I stopped

00:32:22.140 --> 00:32:23.900
using it because someone said it sounded too

00:32:23.900 --> 00:32:25.680
much like I was selling payroll services. And

00:32:25.680 --> 00:32:28.519
I'm like, no, but the thing is, is that if you

00:32:28.519 --> 00:32:30.859
can outsource the subpoena, which is the one

00:32:30.859 --> 00:32:33.960
thing that I see a lot of attorneys under utilizing.

00:32:34.220 --> 00:32:37.259
I'm like, why would you not outsource it when

00:32:37.259 --> 00:32:39.519
you can trust that it's going to be done correctly?

00:32:39.680 --> 00:32:42.579
And by the way, if for some reason, and I don't

00:32:42.579 --> 00:32:44.839
anticipate this happening for some reason, if

00:32:44.839 --> 00:32:46.619
the subpoena doesn't go through, they don't pay.

00:32:47.470 --> 00:32:50.630
So it's a no brainer thing. And also I don't

00:32:50.630 --> 00:32:53.170
see, you know, people will chat, cheat, BT. No,

00:32:53.269 --> 00:32:55.009
because you have to know the knowledge in your

00:32:55.009 --> 00:32:57.910
head in order to, maybe it could make it things

00:32:57.910 --> 00:33:00.609
pretty, but you still have to understand those

00:33:00.609 --> 00:33:03.210
steps that need to be taken. I, even though we

00:33:03.210 --> 00:33:08.009
talked before, I learned so much. I'm like blown

00:33:08.009 --> 00:33:11.250
away by your business because I think the business

00:33:11.250 --> 00:33:14.160
model is is really thoughtful and incredible.

00:33:15.059 --> 00:33:16.759
And oh, yeah, and I want to help you. So I want

00:33:16.759 --> 00:33:19.039
to come back to you with on LinkedIn to show

00:33:19.039 --> 00:33:21.619
you how you could do the campaign to reach the

00:33:21.619 --> 00:33:24.859
attorneys so that I know and I so first of all,

00:33:24.880 --> 00:33:27.640
let me put a plug in for you because I really

00:33:27.640 --> 00:33:30.000
I mean, we were on the phone what five minutes

00:33:30.000 --> 00:33:34.460
and you were like And I, and I said to you, I'm

00:33:34.460 --> 00:33:36.700
like, this is so much like me when people call

00:33:36.700 --> 00:33:38.180
me about divorce. I'm like, okay, do you have

00:33:38.180 --> 00:33:40.200
a pen and a paper? That's it. That's good work.

00:33:40.440 --> 00:33:42.279
And I don't ask them for any money. You know

00:33:42.279 --> 00:33:44.099
what I mean? It's just like, look, it's just,

00:33:44.160 --> 00:33:46.339
I have such a passion and you can tell that you

00:33:46.339 --> 00:33:49.599
have a passion for this too, because you, you

00:33:49.599 --> 00:33:52.480
see things that other people don't see. You know

00:33:52.480 --> 00:33:55.519
what other people don't know. And so you're able

00:33:55.519 --> 00:33:58.900
to quickly and, and it creates movement. When

00:33:58.900 --> 00:34:00.380
you talk fast like that, you're like, oh my,

00:34:00.299 --> 00:34:05.680
Okay. And you create such value in that relationship

00:34:05.680 --> 00:34:08.739
that when, and I truly believe this because I'm

00:34:08.739 --> 00:34:12.039
a business person, I'm also an entrepreneur and

00:34:12.039 --> 00:34:14.679
a marketers. It, it builds that relationship

00:34:14.679 --> 00:34:16.900
of trust that when they're like, Oh yeah, she's

00:34:16.900 --> 00:34:18.920
my girl. Like when I come back, we got to do

00:34:18.920 --> 00:34:22.539
this. Like, so I really, really appreciate because

00:34:22.539 --> 00:34:25.710
you don't find them very often. your marketing

00:34:25.710 --> 00:34:28.190
should have your photo on everything. I think

00:34:28.190 --> 00:34:32.150
that that, no, seriously, because, and you're

00:34:32.150 --> 00:34:33.570
also very, you're beautiful, but you're very

00:34:33.570 --> 00:34:36.690
wholesome too. Like there's like the, it's just

00:34:36.690 --> 00:34:41.110
like a comfortable feeling. So I, and I think

00:34:41.110 --> 00:34:42.710
that's what it is. I, you know, I was a score

00:34:42.710 --> 00:34:44.969
for eight years. So I heard a lot about different

00:34:44.969 --> 00:34:48.250
businesses and score is an amazing. I love being

00:34:48.250 --> 00:34:51.769
a certified mentor and chair here in our community.

00:34:52.059 --> 00:34:54.780
But when you really hear a business that you're

00:34:54.780 --> 00:34:57.760
like, okay, this business is only going to be

00:34:57.760 --> 00:35:01.000
successful. It's got every single thing to make

00:35:01.000 --> 00:35:04.159
it successful. I mean, like, I just am so I love

00:35:04.159 --> 00:35:07.019
doing swats. And I'm like, gosh, really, the

00:35:07.019 --> 00:35:09.960
only threat I could see would be an attorney

00:35:09.960 --> 00:35:13.840
rushing and not caring or thinking that they

00:35:13.840 --> 00:35:16.619
hire someone that that could just all do it on

00:35:16.619 --> 00:35:19.960
AI and then the rejection. No, it doesn't. It

00:35:19.960 --> 00:35:21.840
doesn't work like that, right? No. And the wonderful

00:35:21.840 --> 00:35:24.860
thing is, is I've always believed in business.

00:35:24.860 --> 00:35:27.599
You have to have a win, win, win, win. Like I,

00:35:27.860 --> 00:35:29.940
it's not just a win, win. Like this is a win

00:35:29.940 --> 00:35:32.760
for the people who work for me, the only subpoenas,

00:35:32.900 --> 00:35:35.559
cause they're, they have income, you know, as

00:35:35.559 --> 00:35:37.679
much as or a little as they want. It's a win

00:35:37.679 --> 00:35:39.980
for the only subpoenas and growing the brand

00:35:39.980 --> 00:35:42.199
and getting out there. It's a win for the attorneys

00:35:42.199 --> 00:35:44.179
cause they don't have to deal with all the hassle

00:35:44.179 --> 00:35:47.929
of the compliance and making sure that it's going

00:35:47.929 --> 00:35:50.449
to go through and all this other garbage. And

00:35:50.449 --> 00:35:51.690
then it's a win for the people going through

00:35:51.690 --> 00:35:54.289
the divorce or that's in the court case because

00:35:54.289 --> 00:35:56.590
they get the information that they need. And

00:35:56.590 --> 00:36:00.869
I'm like, okay, this is it. Okay, one last thing,

00:36:01.050 --> 00:36:02.610
one last thing, because I'm thinking to myself,

00:36:03.030 --> 00:36:05.769
you said don't marry your first attorney. So

00:36:05.769 --> 00:36:08.449
if I was going to talk to attorney, I feel now

00:36:08.449 --> 00:36:10.769
I have like, may I ask you how many subpoenas

00:36:10.769 --> 00:36:13.030
you actually have approved? Because they must

00:36:13.030 --> 00:36:16.030
have a percentage, right? Like how, because that

00:36:16.030 --> 00:36:18.369
would, what if they said to me, well, you know,

00:36:18.570 --> 00:36:20.610
not every, if they said to me, if they answered,

00:36:20.989 --> 00:36:24.579
not every subpoena goes through. I would be like,

00:36:24.719 --> 00:36:26.340
okay, wait a second. That to me is a little bit

00:36:26.340 --> 00:36:28.579
of a red flag now that I've learned. What do

00:36:28.579 --> 00:36:30.280
you mean? Like, why is it not going through?

00:36:30.420 --> 00:36:32.739
I would ask. And I'd want, I like, I'm not saying

00:36:32.739 --> 00:36:34.880
that that's the only reason why I would or would

00:36:34.880 --> 00:36:37.900
not work with an attorney, but I think it's an

00:36:37.900 --> 00:36:40.880
important one, especially if there is a lot of

00:36:40.880 --> 00:36:43.960
information that's needed for the case. Well,

00:36:44.119 --> 00:36:45.920
hopefully you don't need subpoenas. Let me just

00:36:45.920 --> 00:36:47.679
start off with that, right? Like, hopefully you

00:36:47.679 --> 00:36:50.159
don't need them. Okay. I wouldn't be, that would,

00:36:50.219 --> 00:36:52.860
that wouldn't be my first, um, thing going in

00:36:52.860 --> 00:36:55.860
hiring an attorney. I really would interview

00:36:55.860 --> 00:36:58.559
the attorney to see how they feel, how, how you

00:36:58.559 --> 00:37:01.039
feel with them. How do you communicate? How do

00:37:01.039 --> 00:37:03.860
you ask them questions? Like how often do you

00:37:03.860 --> 00:37:06.079
communicate with your clients? Do you have any

00:37:06.079 --> 00:37:08.480
kind of educational, you know, how do you educate

00:37:08.480 --> 00:37:10.039
me on the system? And they said, no, we don't

00:37:10.039 --> 00:37:14.349
do that. You know, if they, if they're really

00:37:14.349 --> 00:37:16.530
stickler on their money, like they're charging

00:37:16.530 --> 00:37:19.050
you every six seconds and every six minutes,

00:37:19.510 --> 00:37:24.230
I probably wouldn't. For me personally, that

00:37:24.230 --> 00:37:26.289
was that wouldn't work with me because I'm a

00:37:26.289 --> 00:37:28.670
communicator. And so I ended up having an attorney

00:37:28.670 --> 00:37:31.289
that did a flat fee, which was great because

00:37:31.289 --> 00:37:34.130
he was he was available to me at all times. But

00:37:34.130 --> 00:37:37.650
the relationship like if it's already strained

00:37:37.650 --> 00:37:40.550
from the very beginning, Their signs, then it's

00:37:40.550 --> 00:37:41.750
probably going to be strained through your divorce.

00:37:41.809 --> 00:37:43.449
And then you're going to the point where you're

00:37:43.449 --> 00:37:45.349
going to end up having to fire them and start

00:37:45.349 --> 00:37:47.510
all over the process. And if that you do not

00:37:47.510 --> 00:37:49.909
want to you too, that's like going through a

00:37:49.909 --> 00:37:53.590
whole nother divorce again. So I, you know, there's

00:37:53.590 --> 00:37:56.389
very specific questions, but it is a relationship

00:37:56.389 --> 00:37:58.909
and realize that you're, you're, you're trying

00:37:58.909 --> 00:38:02.070
to many years ago, I hired and fired a lot of

00:38:02.070 --> 00:38:05.369
people in my industry. I was a property manager

00:38:05.369 --> 00:38:07.409
for a large apartment complex and actually worked

00:38:07.409 --> 00:38:10.619
for an attorney. But when I first started hiring

00:38:10.619 --> 00:38:12.739
people, I just didn't ask the right question.

00:38:13.300 --> 00:38:15.400
And now after I've talked to so many attorneys

00:38:15.400 --> 00:38:20.199
over the years, you've got to spend the time

00:38:20.199 --> 00:38:22.400
enough to interview them. What's your retainer?

00:38:22.440 --> 00:38:26.900
How often do you want to get paid? Or what's

00:38:26.900 --> 00:38:31.469
the process of communication? you know, how do

00:38:31.469 --> 00:38:33.530
we get documents back and forth? Is this just

00:38:33.530 --> 00:38:36.349
through email or do you have a system or do you

00:38:36.349 --> 00:38:38.150
have a paralegal that I can work with more often?

00:38:38.230 --> 00:38:41.030
Do I pay the paralegal, the lower rate versus

00:38:41.030 --> 00:38:43.809
the higher rate to you? Or would you prefer,

00:38:44.329 --> 00:38:46.329
how can I help and assist you in the thing that

00:38:46.329 --> 00:38:48.949
I'm not a bother, but I'm, you know, and, and

00:38:48.949 --> 00:38:51.429
how they respond to all of those things matters.

00:38:52.230 --> 00:38:54.630
Wow. You know, it's weird is I just realized

00:38:54.630 --> 00:38:58.260
that I was divorced before. Sorry, Steve Colvin.

00:38:58.380 --> 00:39:01.159
I it's so funny. I'm like I'm thinking to myself.

00:39:01.300 --> 00:39:03.039
I never went through this and I'm like Adrian

00:39:03.039 --> 00:39:05.800
It's been almost 30 years So it's like another

00:39:05.800 --> 00:39:08.840
part of my life and I remember it was like one

00:39:08.840 --> 00:39:10.960
of those things like oh the attorney's a killer

00:39:10.960 --> 00:39:13.159
You know, she wins every case like those are

00:39:13.159 --> 00:39:15.599
the things that you go in and that's all you

00:39:15.599 --> 00:39:18.300
know So you're thinking okay. This person is

00:39:18.300 --> 00:39:20.599
coming so highly recommended not even sure who

00:39:20.599 --> 00:39:24.280
I think my mind helped me but um, but at the

00:39:24.280 --> 00:39:28.130
end of the day I mean, I guess it was all ended

00:39:28.130 --> 00:39:33.590
great. But this was really one of my top interviews

00:39:33.590 --> 00:39:37.230
because I learned so much. I really didn't realize

00:39:37.230 --> 00:39:39.969
all of everything that's going on. And you had

00:39:39.969 --> 00:39:41.949
so many quotes in here. And I love what you said.

00:39:42.309 --> 00:39:47.760
It's a marriage is a financial transaction. I

00:39:47.760 --> 00:39:50.500
hate to say that because my mom, when, when things

00:39:50.500 --> 00:39:54.099
got tough, my mom said, Becky, it's just business.

00:39:54.119 --> 00:39:56.699
Now pull your big girl panties up and get to

00:39:56.699 --> 00:40:02.300
work. And I, I wasn't left with a choice. And

00:40:02.300 --> 00:40:04.840
so I would have loved to work on it. I told them,

00:40:04.960 --> 00:40:07.460
I said, like, look, I, I never in a million years

00:40:07.460 --> 00:40:11.059
that I'd be divorced once, let alone twice. and

00:40:11.059 --> 00:40:14.039
not but he was not willing to give me an option

00:40:14.039 --> 00:40:17.079
so yeah at some point i had to just pull my big

00:40:17.079 --> 00:40:21.260
girl panties up and get to work and every day.

00:40:22.019 --> 00:40:24.739
I had to wake up and just go okay just for today

00:40:24.739 --> 00:40:28.760
and mentally emotionally spiritually prepare

00:40:28.760 --> 00:40:33.320
myself to go to all those hearings and self care

00:40:33.320 --> 00:40:36.179
became my number one priority. I had to take

00:40:36.179 --> 00:40:39.039
care of my mindset because my greatest weapon,

00:40:39.079 --> 00:40:43.039
and I hate to use a weapon, but my greatest tool,

00:40:43.440 --> 00:40:46.460
so to speak, was keeping my heart soft towards

00:40:46.460 --> 00:40:51.619
him. Oh, oh my gosh. Okay. So this was an amazing,

00:40:51.639 --> 00:40:53.840
amazing interview. If you're just joining us,

00:40:53.920 --> 00:40:57.320
go back and listen and Becky with only subpoenas.

00:40:57.400 --> 00:40:59.159
Is there anything that you wish I would have

00:40:59.159 --> 00:41:03.639
asked you that I didn't ask you? Oh, you're I've

00:41:03.639 --> 00:41:06.099
done so many podcasts and radio and TV. I always

00:41:06.099 --> 00:41:08.019
believe that whatever came out was supposed to

00:41:08.019 --> 00:41:10.260
be whatever it was supposed to be. I never edit

00:41:10.260 --> 00:41:13.079
any of my things. I mean, obviously if, if people

00:41:13.079 --> 00:41:15.860
want to work with the, uh, Becky Sampson .com

00:41:15.860 --> 00:41:19.000
is also my personal professional website that

00:41:19.000 --> 00:41:20.659
goes through all my coaching and stuff like that.

00:41:20.719 --> 00:41:24.360
But I just, I just, my heart goes out to so many

00:41:24.360 --> 00:41:28.500
people who are suffering in this space. Um, however

00:41:28.500 --> 00:41:32.630
it is temporary and, um, and I have all the love

00:41:32.630 --> 00:41:39.130
in my heart and support to this community. Yeah.

00:41:39.969 --> 00:41:42.489
I love it. And so much for giving me this opportunity

00:41:42.489 --> 00:41:46.190
to come and just be the shining light that you

00:41:46.190 --> 00:41:48.389
are too. I just, I know we just had a little

00:41:48.389 --> 00:41:50.389
bit the other day, but I got off the phone and

00:41:50.389 --> 00:41:53.110
I'm like, Oh my gosh, this lady's amazing. Did

00:41:53.110 --> 00:41:56.670
you tell Nico we said hello? Yes, I did. I did.

00:41:56.909 --> 00:42:01.280
She was so happy. She was really excited. I love

00:42:01.280 --> 00:42:03.420
it. All right. This will be turned into a podcast.

00:42:03.619 --> 00:42:06.300
Thank you so much for your time. Thank you, everyone.

00:42:06.460 --> 00:42:09.360
Oh, wonderful. Have a great, great rest of the

00:42:09.360 --> 00:42:12.019
week and weekend. And wait, what state are you

00:42:12.019 --> 00:42:16.039
in? I'm in Utah now. It wasn't Hawaii. So Aloha,

00:42:16.179 --> 00:42:20.559
I will still say, but I'm now in Utah. Oh my

00:42:20.559 --> 00:42:23.679
gosh. It's gorgeous there. Wow. You see the mountains?

00:42:24.420 --> 00:42:26.980
I do. And we're raising some cows. We're about

00:42:26.980 --> 00:42:29.500
to have a cow in a month. I told my husband,

00:42:29.739 --> 00:42:34.280
I said, can I domesticate this cow harness on

00:42:34.280 --> 00:42:39.400
it and bring it inside? Oh my gosh. Okay. That

00:42:39.400 --> 00:42:41.760
is awesome. Thank you so much. Have a great rest

00:42:41.760 --> 00:42:43.659
of the day. I love it. I'm going to end the stream.

00:42:44.039 --> 00:42:47.500
You have been an incredible. Thank you so much.