Proactive Approach in Building Client Relationships

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Oh, let me turn off my phone. Me too. Go live,

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okay. Okay, it says we're live. OK, welcome to

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Adrian Barker Speeds. No prep needed, which means

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I have no clue who Rhonda Palmer is. We just

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met. I'm like, what if Rhonda and I live in the

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same city? Wouldn't that be interesting? Hi Rhonda,

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I'm Adrian Barker. Hi Adrian, nice to meet you.

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Nice to meet you too. I'm in Daytona Beach, FL.

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I'm in Houston, TX. We're so close. Just a couple

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hours drive. Wow, I know a lot of people in Houston.

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So who is? Rhonda Palmer, besides being brave,

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bold, and beautiful. I mean, you guys, you think,

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oh, I could go on. Most people are like, no,

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I don't want to go live. I'm scared of you, Adrienne.

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You freak me out. And so, no, I'm not doing it.

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But Rhonda said yes. So hi, Rhonda. Take it away.

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OK. So Adrienne, just like everybody else, so

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many facts that's here, right? So of course,

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daughter and wife. I'm not a mother, but I do

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have, oh, I don't know, 42. nieces and nephews

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and six godchildren. I'm a former educator 31

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years in public ed from substitute all the way

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to associate superintendent and then now entrepreneur

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and started my own coaching and consulting um

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business it's business coaching actually so I

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thought I would get out of education and then

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sort of hang on be a little cling on and keep

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working with principals or you know doing evaluations

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or even writing proposals or whatever. And it

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didn't happen. And I just I had like three or

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four clients and it just was so slow. So in my

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mission statement, I took out the word school

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leaders and just left it as leaders and the clients

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quadrupled in the next three weeks. So anyway,

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that's what I do now. I love coaching. It's mostly

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mindset work. As I worked in public ed, I realized,

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hey, I'm, you know, the last 12 years especially,

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I'm working with low performing schools and what's

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the problem? Everyone says the solution is go

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in there and clean house, fire the principal,

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get some new teachers. Well, they're the best

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teachers and principals we have. They're the

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ones that want to do it. They're there, they're

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coming every day. So can we do a little evaluation

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first? And what I found, it took me really like

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three years to sort of get this fresh and in

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my head where I could speak it out loud, but

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it was basically a mindset problem. And when

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we go through the questioning and, you know,

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we would do this thing called five whys, you

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know, why are these the scores? Because this,

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because this, why, why, why, why, why? And really

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it boiled down to limiting beliefs from the students

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or from the teachers and mostly from the teachers.

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And so we just trained our principals on how

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to help work through those. And it boils down

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to this, Adrienne, like a kid is not limited

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by their zip code or by their parents' income.

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And once a teacher and a principal or school

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leaders at any level can walk into a classroom

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and see these little children or teenagers as

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the future selves that they will become, it changes.

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Here's there's a doctor. There's a teacher. There's

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a construction worker. There's a politician.

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There's a Teacher at our school in the next 20

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years. I mean just looking at them differently

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Changed the outcome. So anyway, I said if we

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can do that in education, let's try it with nonprofits.

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Let's try it with small business Let's try it

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with big organizations and it works. I don't

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work without action I mean, I'm not saying you

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could just say oh it's gonna be better and it'll

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happen a lot of things in between but It's basically

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that. I love that. OK, so when I'm looking and

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watching an interview about someone successful

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and they're asked about their school years, they

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are usually actually at. So what is your school

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years look like? And they'll say I am successful

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because Mr. Joe believed in me or Miss Sally.

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believed in me and that's all I needed. She believed

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in me. So I totally agree with you. I hope there's

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schools out there listening. So Rhonda's not

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available for you, but maybe she will be. But

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yeah, change the mindset. And so I'm 62. I act

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like I'm 32. I'm so happy that people my age

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because I have a lot of energy. Even when I'm

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dealing with kidney stones. Look at me. I'm like

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dealing with kidney stones. And yeah, the average

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person would be in bed and crying. But that's

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because of my mindset, right? That's because

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of the grit, determination and mindset. So what

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is it like? Like what is you because I know you

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could say business and that's so vast. So what's

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your niche niche? OK, so it's it has actually

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turned out to be people who are starting up a

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brand new business or mostly nonprofits. And

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believe it or not, I've ended up with quite a

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few pastors. And if you think about. anyone,

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any clergy, I mean, they're, they're so often

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working in a silo. I mean, there's organized

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religion and groups that have, you know, tiers

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or whatever tier levels of support, but basically

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they're by themselves and they, you know, whatever

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volunteers they can drum up or if they're, if

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they're fortunate enough to be in a church that

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has a little bit more budget where they can hire

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a couple of full -time or a handful of part -time

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staff, but still they, What I ended up doing

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is coaching them. And I love coaching. I know

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this is gonna sound, I don't mean this to sound

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any way except for what it is, is that when you're

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coaching, you're basically helping to point out

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blind spots. If you can really equate it to an

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athletic coach. I just think of the NFL. The

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players on the NFL team are way better. than

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the coaches. A coach would not be able to get

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out there and block, kick, pass, catch, but they

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can see the blind spots. They know what to do.

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They know how to do it, but either, you know,

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their time is gone or, you know, for whatever

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reason, they're not the ones on the field, but

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they still know what's going on and they know

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how to. find blind spots. And so I used to say,

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we were here in Houston and we had JJ Watt for

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so long. And I used to say, you know, even JJ

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Watt has a coach and he was, you know, at the

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top of the charts for so many years while he

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was here. But it's true. It's not to tell you

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what to do. It's to point out those blind spots.

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So what I love doing, Adrienne, is just simply

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getting in those coaching situations where I

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can ask questions. Most people have the answers

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within them. there's something blocking to get

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them to move forward, or there's something blocking

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their own belief system, or there's something

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kind of stalled out. And sometimes it's not their

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fault, but it's their responsibility to fix it.

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So we have outside factors. I'm not saying, you

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know, you're in charge of everything, because

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stuff happens, you know, like those stones, okay?

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You know, it's not your fault, but you have to

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deal with it. And so I coach people on how to...

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get through it. So most of my business is coaching,

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but I love doing retreats and going into and

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working out on professional development. So I'm

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a John Maxwell certified disc behavior analysis

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trainer, and I work through all those masterminds

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and love setting up, especially organizations

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and nonprofits to go through those leadership

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trainings. And I have leadership training to

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I love that. Okay, so the analogy, I, and I wrote

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ago or so. I love the get not every team has

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it, but a good one to add to your coach and what

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they repr to business. I'll send y I'm like people,

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we all coach, someone to have a Think, get back,

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Adrienne, get all the way back. Hold on for a

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second. Alan, I'm doing a podcast reporting,

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so be quiet. My husband, he won't be here all

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day and then he'll come in at the worst time.

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And then he's loud and noisy too. It's really

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annoying. Okay, so I'm not the only one then,

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right? Oh no, no. But anyways, so the get back

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coach is important to me. All right, in the coaching

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area, yes, people absolutely do need that. And

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maybe you realize when you said it, I'm thinking,

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you know, I'm a consultant, not really a coach.

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Coaches... have your kind of training. But I

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do want to talk about something because you mentioned

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the disc and I had on a great guest last week

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and we were talking about the disc programs and

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we were talking about neurodivergent minds and

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how what like that this program really may not

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be able to be something that's someone would

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not maybe they could take it but maybe it won't

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give them the accurate results or maybe they're

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just frustrated taking it and I wish in business

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that there was more understanding of our crazy

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brains. I'm talking about myself really not you

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know I'm not talking about you out there but

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that neurodivergent your brain can just um can

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get in the way sometimes now I got the dog crying

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is going on so so can you address that please

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and then my soul because I consider myself a

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brain researcher and that is my I I'm like the

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Groupy to all these real brain researchers So

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I read all of their stuff and try to put it in

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my own words and in my trainings to help people

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understand and that's what I'm talking about

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on mindset and this is so You know how things

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just kind of align in the in the universe like

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we're talking about this You were just had that

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person last week and then believe it or not just

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at church the other week my pastor mentioned

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she was talking about the the Gosh, don't say

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it wrong Rhonda the armor of God and one of them

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was the helmet and she's talking about how in

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Back then when they were trying to write all

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this stuff where people under in a way people

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understood it They didn't have all the research

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we know now, but even back then they said Protect

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your mind and renew your mind and what we know

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now through neurosurgeons and neuro research.

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And every university that studies the brain has

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some kind of study that leads to this. And we

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didn't even know this until 1997 that your brain

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has that neuroplasticity that can change. It

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was thought all the way until 1997 that you're

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born with the cells you have, that's it. You

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mess them up, that's your fault. You're just

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going downhill from now. But that's not true.

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You can regenerate brain cells and there's certain

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formulas for everybody to do this but the best

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thing about it is and what we've learned even

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going back to spiritual not just biblical but

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every religion or every spiritual group you can

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think of talks about guarding your tongue and

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because your tongue is like a creative force

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and it's not really just your tongue it's your

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thoughts too your thoughts and your words create

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an imprint on your brain that produces a chemical

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and a structural change. So you're talking about,

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you know, divergent thinkers. The divergent thinkers

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have so many different connections in their brains

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that when presented with a certain situation,

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they don't really realize which connection they're

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supposed to pull up because there's way more

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than what other people have. And that sounds,

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I don't mean to sound elitist, but there's a

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lot of people who have that. And to others, it

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looks haphazard or almost like a deficit. And

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so a person needs to come up with a coping strategy

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to do that. Now on the disc, what they found

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is, especially for a person who's a D, they're

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very direct, if they've learned that coping skill,

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then they come up with a false D and everything

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else is high and D is way low. It would be surprising

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to look at some of those results, but they've

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learned, even though they're very direct and

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this is how they like to communicate and behave,

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they're self -aware and so they have those different

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divergent strategies, they're very task -oriented,

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but they've learned some emotional intelligence

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and how to compartmentalize that so they can

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relate to everybody else. And I found that a

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lot of people with divergent thinking really

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are Ds because they're sometimes less tolerable

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of the other people, maybe a little judgmental,

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and I'm saying this as a full -on D, okay? So

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if there's any other D's out there, I'm only

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talking about myself, but it happens. Anyway,

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again, going back to that, the neuroscience behind

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this and some of the coping skills, if you look

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at how we've learned to behave and communicate,

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which is mostly what the disc evaluate. Some

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people call it a personality test, but it's really

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behavior and communication. A third of how we

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communicate and act is based on pure hereditary

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hereditary factors. You can't do anything about

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it. You were born like that. A second third is

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what was modeled to you from birth to about age

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12 before you could really kind of start making

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your own decisions about things. You saw it,

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you heard it, and it got imprinted on your brain,

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so that's how you began to communicate and behave.

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That's how people from all over the different

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parts of the country or world have different

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accents. It's modeled to them at that time, and

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it changes the way their brain is, and that's

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how they pronounce things the way they hear it,

00:14:02.100 --> 00:14:03.639
based on what it's called. Wait, wait, wait.

00:14:03.899 --> 00:14:06.440
Rhonda, Rhonda, wait, wait, wait. I can't believe

00:14:06.440 --> 00:14:09.539
it. You answered a question that I've always

00:14:09.539 --> 00:14:11.879
wondered, have always asked, never got the right

00:14:11.879 --> 00:14:15.100
answer. Rhonda Palmer answers it for me. Why

00:14:15.100 --> 00:14:18.139
people have accents? Okay, keep going. Okay,

00:14:18.259 --> 00:14:20.000
and then the third part, and I'm almost done

00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:22.620
because I would love another question. The third

00:14:22.620 --> 00:14:26.159
part is what experiences you've had basically

00:14:26.159 --> 00:14:28.600
from the time you were... eight or nine again

00:14:28.600 --> 00:14:30.480
around that time when you kind of start questioning

00:14:30.480 --> 00:14:32.620
like, do my parents really know everything or

00:14:32.620 --> 00:14:34.519
can I make my own decision? So it's in between

00:14:34.519 --> 00:14:37.860
that eight to twelve age. So from the time you're

00:14:37.860 --> 00:14:40.960
about eight or nine till now, every single experience

00:14:40.960 --> 00:14:44.059
that you could have your own thoughts about impacts

00:14:44.059 --> 00:14:47.379
the way you behave and communicate. So that really

00:14:47.379 --> 00:14:52.379
is the only third that you have any chance of.

00:14:52.600 --> 00:14:56.039
impacting to be able to adapt to other people's

00:14:56.039 --> 00:14:58.879
communication or behavior style. So that is the

00:14:58.879 --> 00:15:04.440
disk in a nutshell. That's why 66 % of how we

00:15:04.440 --> 00:15:07.720
behave and communicate really is untouchable

00:15:07.720 --> 00:15:10.600
because it's already done. So that last third

00:15:10.600 --> 00:15:13.940
and thinking about our own experiences, this

00:15:13.940 --> 00:15:16.460
is that whole metacognition, thinking about thinking.

00:15:17.320 --> 00:15:19.840
That's the only way we're able to adapt. Most

00:15:19.840 --> 00:15:23.519
of us will never change. because that's why we

00:15:23.519 --> 00:15:27.740
are. But you can, with reflection and coping,

00:15:28.100 --> 00:15:30.779
you can adapt. And that's all we hope to be able

00:15:30.779 --> 00:15:37.620
to do. So is this a little lesson on NLP? I really

00:15:37.620 --> 00:15:40.100
never, I never understood it. Like, can you explain

00:15:40.100 --> 00:15:42.100
to me, like if I asked ChatGPT to explain it

00:15:42.100 --> 00:15:48.200
like I'm five? NLP? Is that where you're going

00:15:48.200 --> 00:15:53.330
in and changing? Not really, I mean I I do I

00:15:53.330 --> 00:16:01.590
do think that I mean if we think about Even though

00:16:01.590 --> 00:16:03.649
there that's piece of it that's not really what

00:16:03.649 --> 00:16:05.990
what my specialty is and so if I were to think

00:16:05.990 --> 00:16:10.629
about that it's that's really just the I have

00:16:10.629 --> 00:16:13.769
to when I think about it I think about how how

00:16:13.769 --> 00:16:16.129
I was taught to teach and everything goes back

00:16:16.129 --> 00:16:17.909
to what I was talking about on that metacognition

00:16:17.909 --> 00:16:21.759
and that's it's It's showing somebody something,

00:16:22.259 --> 00:16:24.299
telling them about it, letting them practice

00:16:24.299 --> 00:16:27.580
a little bit with it, generate their own thoughts

00:16:27.580 --> 00:16:30.220
about it, experience it, think about it, talk

00:16:30.220 --> 00:16:33.320
about it. It's all this multi -sensory integrated.

00:16:33.440 --> 00:16:35.259
Now, I don't even know if that's what NLP is.

00:16:35.340 --> 00:16:37.820
I just know that's how, when I'm trying to teach

00:16:37.820 --> 00:16:40.279
somebody something, that's how I'm going with

00:16:40.279 --> 00:16:43.659
it. So it's helping make sure you understand.

00:16:43.720 --> 00:16:45.980
Now, If you're going to put that in terms of

00:16:45.980 --> 00:16:49.179
AI and moving that way, that is I have a friend

00:16:49.179 --> 00:16:55.740
who's training computers to be able to work in

00:16:55.740 --> 00:16:58.700
call centers. And one of the things they did,

00:16:59.360 --> 00:17:03.220
they paid people $100 to read a book, and they

00:17:03.220 --> 00:17:05.519
picked people from all different ages, genders,

00:17:05.680 --> 00:17:07.660
and every place around the country. So they would

00:17:07.660 --> 00:17:10.500
pick up all those different accents. And they

00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:13.549
did some kind of program. so that the voice would

00:17:13.549 --> 00:17:15.710
sound natural and you could pick whatever kind

00:17:15.710 --> 00:17:17.690
of voice. Have you seen any of those kinds of

00:17:17.690 --> 00:17:20.450
things? I kind of believe it. I've seen like

00:17:20.450 --> 00:17:22.390
some of it more for business. Like you, I could

00:17:22.390 --> 00:17:24.769
do a video and then I could have the voice. I

00:17:24.769 --> 00:17:28.430
actually just used an AI photo of me. And then

00:17:28.430 --> 00:17:30.109
the weird thing is now that I'm looking at myself,

00:17:30.210 --> 00:17:31.730
I'm like, Oh my God, I really do look like that

00:17:31.730 --> 00:17:33.890
photo. At first I didn't see myself and now I'm

00:17:33.890 --> 00:17:36.250
like, I really, so none of you have to know it's

00:17:36.250 --> 00:17:39.650
my real profile. It's amazing. All right. So

00:17:39.650 --> 00:17:44.490
last night, I am half of a host, so I co -host

00:17:44.490 --> 00:17:48.970
the Debate the News True Crime edition with Joseph.

00:17:49.730 --> 00:17:52.950
And Joseph's got like the smoothest voice, more

00:17:52.950 --> 00:17:55.630
than anyone who has a voice. His voice is amazing.

00:17:56.390 --> 00:17:58.529
I like, sometimes I have trouble with words and

00:17:58.529 --> 00:18:01.549
I'm like, Joseph, help me. Like I'll just have

00:18:01.549 --> 00:18:03.410
like, I've always had like a little, I don't

00:18:03.410 --> 00:18:04.930
know, a little just trouble with some words.

00:18:05.829 --> 00:18:10.740
But anyways, we were talking about Nexium. and

00:18:10.740 --> 00:18:14.240
what they would call the cult out of Albany with

00:18:14.240 --> 00:18:17.559
Keith Ranieri. And what I think was fascinating

00:18:17.559 --> 00:18:21.160
for all of us was what was taking place with

00:18:21.160 --> 00:18:24.220
all the women. I mean, here it is. Hey, women,

00:18:24.259 --> 00:18:26.140
we're gonna all have a women's empowerment group.

00:18:26.359 --> 00:18:28.079
Let's all get around a circle. I know it wasn't

00:18:28.079 --> 00:18:31.079
this simple. And then now we need to be submissive

00:18:31.079 --> 00:18:34.799
to our men. But yeah, when you really go through

00:18:34.799 --> 00:18:38.559
that story, to me, that's a really good example.

00:18:38.809 --> 00:18:41.890
of how conditioned they became and like what

00:18:41.890 --> 00:18:45.589
he did not feeding them enough so sleep deprivation

00:18:45.589 --> 00:18:49.609
800 calories just constant learning on the outside

00:18:49.609 --> 00:18:52.450
beautiful you know brochures that look amazing

00:18:52.450 --> 00:18:56.829
and even you know very wealthy people and celebrities

00:18:56.829 --> 00:18:59.109
were really buying into it and were they buying

00:18:59.109 --> 00:19:01.750
into it because they they wanted to be something

00:19:01.750 --> 00:19:04.180
like so Can you address that? Because I think

00:19:04.180 --> 00:19:07.660
that that is really just an interesting part

00:19:07.660 --> 00:19:11.779
of how someone could actually be become an occult

00:19:11.779 --> 00:19:13.940
and what that would look like. I know it's crazy,

00:19:13.980 --> 00:19:17.700
but I was just curious when the rain. So if I

00:19:17.700 --> 00:19:20.420
again, my only real frame of reference on this

00:19:20.420 --> 00:19:22.420
is what you just talked about, that conditioning

00:19:22.420 --> 00:19:27.339
and the teaching. So. In in schools and in in

00:19:27.339 --> 00:19:32.710
organizations, we try to create a. Culture, and

00:19:32.710 --> 00:19:36.170
the root word there is cult, okay? So we want

00:19:36.170 --> 00:19:40.490
people to be alike and have a common goal, a

00:19:40.490 --> 00:19:46.230
rally cry. What's our vision? What do we expect

00:19:46.230 --> 00:19:48.849
from each other? So my point of reference is

00:19:48.849 --> 00:19:51.789
from the positive side of this, where we're building

00:19:51.789 --> 00:19:56.450
loyalty and... and engaging people, empowering

00:19:56.450 --> 00:19:59.950
them to also have decisions into how we will

00:19:59.950 --> 00:20:03.549
get to our outcomes. So it's the same process

00:20:03.549 --> 00:20:07.150
though. What y 'all experienced on that cult

00:20:07.150 --> 00:20:10.750
side with the conditioning of limiting the food,

00:20:10.970 --> 00:20:14.569
limiting their sleep, limiting this, to get a

00:20:14.569 --> 00:20:17.849
negative result, we do the exact opposite with

00:20:17.849 --> 00:20:21.390
the others. We offer choices. We set the vision

00:20:21.390 --> 00:20:24.279
and mission. But we give choices. I'll give you

00:20:24.279 --> 00:20:26.599
an example. I used to say this all the time when

00:20:26.599 --> 00:20:29.200
I was working with a brand new leader, like,

00:20:29.559 --> 00:20:32.880
hey, you don't want to accidentally start micromanaging.

00:20:33.099 --> 00:20:37.400
It's so, especially for a small, either an entrepreneur,

00:20:37.759 --> 00:20:40.460
solopreneur or small business, you know, they're

00:20:40.460 --> 00:20:42.440
just barely growing. They have in their head

00:20:42.440 --> 00:20:44.960
what they want and what they expect and how to

00:20:44.960 --> 00:20:47.859
get there. And they're tempted to hire a person

00:20:47.859 --> 00:20:50.200
basically to just do everything they say, just

00:20:50.200 --> 00:20:52.309
do everything I say. You know, answer the emails,

00:20:52.349 --> 00:20:54.609
do the mail, do that, do that. And that's OK,

00:20:54.609 --> 00:20:57.390
but you're not going to get a real engaged employee

00:20:57.390 --> 00:20:59.789
there. They're going to feel like a slave. And

00:20:59.789 --> 00:21:04.470
so how do we empower them to help us reach our

00:21:04.470 --> 00:21:07.210
goals? And that is valuing them as a human being.

00:21:07.269 --> 00:21:09.230
So instead of starving them and letting them

00:21:09.230 --> 00:21:11.970
deprive of sleep, let them have a choice. Hey,

00:21:11.970 --> 00:21:13.309
do you want to stay here for lunch? You want

00:21:13.309 --> 00:21:14.890
to go out for lunch. If you go out for lunch,

00:21:14.890 --> 00:21:16.730
it's going to take a little longer because of

00:21:16.730 --> 00:21:19.190
the traffic. So we got to extend our hours. So

00:21:19.190 --> 00:21:21.450
it's your choice, but. Which one would you like

00:21:21.450 --> 00:21:24.549
to do? Or the schedule. Hey, we've got to do

00:21:24.549 --> 00:21:26.750
these six things. I don't really care how, what

00:21:26.750 --> 00:21:29.490
order they get done, but let's have them all

00:21:29.490 --> 00:21:31.109
done by the end of the day. And this is the example

00:21:31.109 --> 00:21:34.150
I would give a brand new leader. I'll use the

00:21:34.150 --> 00:21:36.549
Texas example. So, hey everyone, we're going

00:21:36.549 --> 00:21:41.410
to meet on the 20th in Austin. Well, whatever

00:21:41.410 --> 00:21:43.750
that, whatever Saturday is, that is the 16th,

00:21:43.750 --> 00:21:45.829
17th, 18th. We're going to meet on the 19th in

00:21:45.829 --> 00:21:49.220
Austin. at four o 'clock p .m. It's a casual

00:21:49.220 --> 00:21:52.140
thing and we're going to have dinner. I'll see

00:21:52.140 --> 00:21:55.380
y 'all there. So all they know is they have to

00:21:55.380 --> 00:21:59.259
be there by four, be casual, be hungry. I didn't

00:21:59.259 --> 00:22:02.160
tell them if they want to fly or drive, if they

00:22:02.160 --> 00:22:04.000
want to come up the night before and party on

00:22:04.000 --> 00:22:06.099
their own and then meet me or come up that morning

00:22:06.099 --> 00:22:07.920
or just get there by the skin of their teeth

00:22:07.920 --> 00:22:11.039
at four o 'clock. It doesn't matter. As a leader

00:22:11.039 --> 00:22:14.619
to get our outcomes we provide choices and just

00:22:14.559 --> 00:22:17.819
focus on the outcomes. Now, when you give those

00:22:17.819 --> 00:22:22.720
choices, that builds that culture of togetherness

00:22:22.720 --> 00:22:26.500
and I'm valuable, I have good ideas, I matter.

00:22:26.839 --> 00:22:28.779
And then it's not just giving them choices, but

00:22:28.779 --> 00:22:32.099
recognizing, noticing when they do great things.

00:22:32.359 --> 00:22:35.420
And you saw that in that cult, they recognize

00:22:35.420 --> 00:22:37.579
them or they, you know, whatever, good job for

00:22:37.579 --> 00:22:39.720
following, you know, whatever, being submissive

00:22:39.720 --> 00:22:41.980
or whatever, but it was the negative impact to

00:22:41.980 --> 00:22:44.299
the negative side of it. So it's interesting

00:22:44.299 --> 00:22:46.960
you brought that up as an example, because it's,

00:22:46.980 --> 00:22:50.099
you do condition people the same way. It's just,

00:22:50.380 --> 00:22:53.700
are you using it for good or evil? Darn it. I

00:22:53.700 --> 00:22:56.279
wish I, I wish I was talking to you yesterday

00:22:56.279 --> 00:22:58.599
morning before, because we never, like that is

00:22:58.599 --> 00:23:01.440
such an interesting part of, of that. None of

00:23:01.440 --> 00:23:03.440
us really thought about that. And that cult is

00:23:03.440 --> 00:23:06.099
in the word culture, but it's in a positive way.

00:23:06.500 --> 00:23:08.720
Oh my gosh. Everyone give a round of applause

00:23:08.720 --> 00:23:12.819
for Rhonda Palmer. Oh, wow, Rhonda, that is so

00:23:12.819 --> 00:23:15.240
interesting. Okay, so now how does someone work

00:23:15.240 --> 00:23:16.980
with you? How do they know they need to work

00:23:16.980 --> 00:23:20.400
with you? I see. Okay, that's a great question

00:23:20.400 --> 00:23:23.299
because I needed, by the way, just want to say

00:23:23.299 --> 00:23:26.980
nothing's around my brain. That's how I get my

00:23:26.980 --> 00:23:30.319
brain working. I really that happened. You know,

00:23:30.460 --> 00:23:33.319
I said, oh, when I, you know, this is over a

00:23:33.319 --> 00:23:35.700
year ago when I first started, hey, I'm going

00:23:35.700 --> 00:23:37.920
to work with principals who need help. Well,

00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:39.920
No principal's going to admit they need help.

00:23:40.259 --> 00:23:42.039
They've arrived, you know. They're the school

00:23:42.039 --> 00:23:44.500
principal. They're in charge, large and in charge.

00:23:44.519 --> 00:23:48.039
They're not going to go hire help. So we say

00:23:48.039 --> 00:23:50.539
it a little differently. It's in schools for

00:23:50.539 --> 00:23:52.759
sure. I'm your thought partner. I'm your mentor.

00:23:52.839 --> 00:23:56.619
I'm your coach. And that's something that is

00:23:56.619 --> 00:23:58.839
going to help you break through whatever topics

00:23:58.839 --> 00:24:03.539
come up without judgment. So when I did this

00:24:03.539 --> 00:24:06.619
job, you know, and got paid for it, even though

00:24:06.619 --> 00:24:09.180
I was still their coach, ultimately at the end

00:24:09.180 --> 00:24:11.380
of the year, I also evaluated them. So I'm sure

00:24:11.380 --> 00:24:15.160
they shielded a little bit from me as people

00:24:15.160 --> 00:24:17.680
that I supervised. But I used to, even though

00:24:17.680 --> 00:24:21.039
I supervised them the whole year, I called myself

00:24:21.039 --> 00:24:23.480
a coach. I only supervised them on the one day

00:24:23.480 --> 00:24:26.559
I needed their signature for the paper. But anyway,

00:24:26.579 --> 00:24:28.359
how do people work with me now? How do they know

00:24:28.359 --> 00:24:33.099
they need help? I work with folks who they're

00:24:33.099 --> 00:24:36.759
either They're either aspiring to become a leader

00:24:36.759 --> 00:24:39.380
or they're already a leader and they're already

00:24:39.380 --> 00:24:41.680
amazing They would never aspire to be a leader

00:24:41.680 --> 00:24:44.339
or already become a leader if they didn't have

00:24:44.339 --> 00:24:46.400
something great within them And I believe truly

00:24:46.400 --> 00:24:49.059
that everyone has that but it's at different

00:24:49.059 --> 00:24:52.200
levels of consciousness So these folks already

00:24:52.200 --> 00:24:53.980
are a leader or they're aspiring to be a leader

00:24:53.980 --> 00:24:55.900
and they're looking to break through something

00:24:55.900 --> 00:24:58.180
Did they just get a brand new team? Did they

00:24:58.180 --> 00:25:01.240
just get transferred to a new role? maybe they're

00:25:01.240 --> 00:25:02.539
working with the same people but they're in a

00:25:02.539 --> 00:25:06.160
new role so like you were a bank teller but now

00:25:06.160 --> 00:25:09.579
you're the the manager of the bank tellers at

00:25:09.579 --> 00:25:12.900
the same organization or maybe you are a bank

00:25:12.900 --> 00:25:16.140
you are the executive director of loans at one

00:25:16.140 --> 00:25:19.559
bank and you got to shift over to another bank

00:25:19.559 --> 00:25:21.779
so you're still the same role but now you're

00:25:21.779 --> 00:25:26.059
with new people so it's it's making sure and

00:25:26.059 --> 00:25:29.640
building them up for success to be confident

00:25:30.190 --> 00:25:33.470
to be able to be clear in their decision -making

00:25:33.470 --> 00:25:36.890
and to build that world -class team. It's not

00:25:36.890 --> 00:25:41.329
to say they don't have the function and the drive

00:25:41.329 --> 00:25:43.009
and the passion and everything within them to

00:25:43.009 --> 00:25:45.289
do it. It's to say that I can help them do it

00:25:45.289 --> 00:25:53.140
faster. So I think, you know, I'm jealous. I'm

00:25:53.140 --> 00:25:56.359
jealous of, of your clients because growing up

00:25:56.359 --> 00:25:58.240
in a family business, I could have really used

00:25:58.240 --> 00:26:00.940
the coach. It's amazing. So, and they, there

00:26:00.940 --> 00:26:03.940
was no such thing as coaches 30 years ago. I

00:26:03.940 --> 00:26:06.099
mean, my God, my mom booked me an appointment.

00:26:06.240 --> 00:26:08.019
I thought I was going to see the gynecologist

00:26:08.019 --> 00:26:10.180
and it was a psychologist. I'm like, mom, you

00:26:10.180 --> 00:26:11.880
don't even know the difference. Like it was crazy.

00:26:12.059 --> 00:26:15.359
Like, so I guess I could have talked to a, maybe

00:26:15.359 --> 00:26:18.099
a psychologist. I don't even know. But I think

00:26:18.099 --> 00:26:20.799
that for everyone that has the opportunity now

00:26:20.799 --> 00:26:24.099
to be able to work with a, and I like that you're

00:26:24.099 --> 00:26:26.559
a business coach. So if I said this is Rhonda

00:26:26.559 --> 00:26:29.559
Palmer, she is a life coach. Would that be a

00:26:29.559 --> 00:26:31.519
correct wording or is it more business and not

00:26:31.519 --> 00:26:34.259
the life side of it? There, there is, I mean,

00:26:34.839 --> 00:26:37.880
I, I like that. I like that question because

00:26:37.880 --> 00:26:41.700
it really is life coaching for people who are

00:26:41.700 --> 00:26:44.740
in a business. They're working because every,

00:26:45.579 --> 00:26:48.460
every aspect of business of this kind of bit.

00:26:48.559 --> 00:26:51.740
Well, Just say business coach. The life coaching

00:26:51.740 --> 00:26:54.240
comes in and I am a certified life coach as well,

00:26:54.440 --> 00:26:56.339
but we're working through business problems.

00:26:56.980 --> 00:26:59.900
Like, you know, how can you, as I mentioned earlier,

00:26:59.900 --> 00:27:02.039
you know, I told you I'm a, I'm John Maxwell

00:27:02.039 --> 00:27:05.140
certified. So I have presented every one of his

00:27:05.140 --> 00:27:08.519
programs and done all those disc pro analysis,

00:27:08.519 --> 00:27:11.680
but I also created my own framework. So when

00:27:11.680 --> 00:27:16.799
working with businesses to audit their own structures

00:27:16.799 --> 00:27:20.750
and processes, I created What I call the ease

00:27:20.750 --> 00:27:23.730
framework and it's it's basically everything

00:27:23.730 --> 00:27:27.849
boils down to four things and the way I say it

00:27:27.849 --> 00:27:33.890
for the safer culture is engage Align support

00:27:33.890 --> 00:27:37.450
and empower now that's just for culture So you're

00:27:37.450 --> 00:27:40.109
going to engage all your stakeholders align your

00:27:40.109 --> 00:27:42.630
actions to your values support everybody with

00:27:42.630 --> 00:27:44.930
clarity and processes and then empower them for

00:27:44.930 --> 00:27:48.339
growth that's That's it in a nutshell. But I

00:27:48.339 --> 00:27:51.380
have one of these ease frameworks for everything

00:27:51.380 --> 00:27:54.819
you can think of, like creating a work schedule,

00:27:55.059 --> 00:27:58.019
doing a values audit, having a sales training,

00:27:59.599 --> 00:28:03.579
creating work partners, building a budget. Every

00:28:03.579 --> 00:28:06.900
kind of business process you could think of as

00:28:06.900 --> 00:28:10.299
a leader or aspiring leader. broken down into

00:28:10.299 --> 00:28:13.099
these four pillars and with that so you the people

00:28:13.099 --> 00:28:15.380
who sign up and work with me get the get the

00:28:15.380 --> 00:28:18.319
handout that tells them what it is and then they

00:28:18.319 --> 00:28:21.180
when they flip that page over and this is going

00:28:21.180 --> 00:28:22.940
into a book my book is not published but it's

00:28:22.940 --> 00:28:25.079
almost published it's called leading with ease

00:28:25.079 --> 00:28:27.400
or ease into leadership excuse me ease into leadership

00:28:27.400 --> 00:28:29.220
it's a just a field guide so you don't have to

00:28:29.220 --> 00:28:31.480
read it cover to cover you figure out what you

00:28:31.480 --> 00:28:34.500
want and go get it but it has an implementation

00:28:34.500 --> 00:28:38.140
rubric So people can self -evaluate, where are

00:28:38.140 --> 00:28:40.599
you on this rubric? And then based on where you

00:28:40.599 --> 00:28:42.500
are, this is the teacher in me coming, okay?

00:28:42.640 --> 00:28:44.900
Based on where you are now, here's some reflective

00:28:44.900 --> 00:28:47.339
questions and some coaching tips to improve.

00:28:48.019 --> 00:28:50.329
Here's where you are, what's the next step? That

00:28:50.329 --> 00:28:52.410
you evaluate again. Okay, here's where you are

00:28:52.410 --> 00:28:54.349
now What's the next step and if you're perfect

00:28:54.349 --> 00:28:56.289
and all of those all the way through then you're

00:28:56.289 --> 00:28:59.329
gonna come on my show and tell me how you got

00:28:59.329 --> 00:29:01.970
there so You know that that that's how that's

00:29:01.970 --> 00:29:04.430
how I roll. It's it's business coaching. But

00:29:04.430 --> 00:29:09.009
as I found out while you're coaching people It

00:29:09.009 --> 00:29:11.069
comes down to a little bit of life coaching too

00:29:11.069 --> 00:29:14.390
because it's either a lack of confidence in themselves

00:29:14.390 --> 00:29:17.430
Or a lack of code the confidence in their team.

00:29:17.430 --> 00:29:21.329
So if it's in themselves That lack of confidence

00:29:21.329 --> 00:29:24.069
or courage in themselves leads to procrastination

00:29:24.069 --> 00:29:29.109
or overworking workaholicism and lack of confidence

00:29:29.109 --> 00:29:32.289
in their team also goes to workaholicism, but

00:29:32.289 --> 00:29:36.250
it's a Micromanagement comes in if they're not

00:29:36.250 --> 00:29:38.470
if they don't trust their team then they micromanage

00:29:38.470 --> 00:29:40.890
them when really they should pause for a minute

00:29:40.890 --> 00:29:44.730
train them and keep working at it that in that

00:29:44.730 --> 00:29:48.460
regard because if you micromanage or Or they

00:29:48.460 --> 00:29:50.680
just don't even give anything to their team and

00:29:50.680 --> 00:29:52.799
they just take it all. Well, I'd rather just

00:29:52.799 --> 00:29:55.960
do it myself. Okay, now you're robbing your teammates

00:29:55.960 --> 00:29:58.839
of their own learning to be able to possibly

00:29:58.839 --> 00:30:01.700
take your spot one day when you retire. So there's

00:30:01.700 --> 00:30:04.460
a lot of life coaching that comes in with business

00:30:04.460 --> 00:30:07.140
coaching, but all of my frameworks are designed

00:30:07.140 --> 00:30:10.720
to help audit business practices and improve

00:30:10.720 --> 00:30:13.200
them so that they have better outcomes and you

00:30:13.200 --> 00:30:15.920
have a world -class team that reaches their goals

00:30:15.920 --> 00:30:19.400
without burnout. I love it right. I love it.

00:30:19.400 --> 00:30:21.339
I love that guy. I got so excited my computer

00:30:21.339 --> 00:30:22.799
didn't know what to do with me like what she's

00:30:22.799 --> 00:30:26.150
gonna have her disappear because Delegation is

00:30:26.150 --> 00:30:27.609
such an important thing. And I found growing

00:30:27.609 --> 00:30:29.890
up in the family business, those that didn't

00:30:29.890 --> 00:30:32.250
delegate, I knew in my mind, I knew, I knew it.

00:30:32.329 --> 00:30:34.569
I was like, they are not great leaders because

00:30:34.569 --> 00:30:36.950
they're not giving someone else a chance to learn,

00:30:37.109 --> 00:30:39.230
like a million reasons behind it, like you said.

00:30:39.589 --> 00:30:42.269
And trying to explain to my parents, no, you

00:30:42.269 --> 00:30:44.369
need people that will delegate. That's how you

00:30:44.369 --> 00:30:46.710
build your leaders up. If you've got someone,

00:30:46.789 --> 00:30:48.630
and then I was thinking the person that doesn't

00:30:48.630 --> 00:30:52.559
like to delegate, you know who you are. Okay,

00:30:52.880 --> 00:30:55.420
so the person that if you don't like to delegate,

00:30:55.900 --> 00:30:59.099
you actually, to me. I think you're lacking self

00:30:59.099 --> 00:31:04.759
-confidence. You're lacking the ability to empathetic

00:31:04.759 --> 00:31:07.039
behavior, to see others and want them to grow.

00:31:07.420 --> 00:31:09.559
I used to, growing up, I was really annoying

00:31:09.559 --> 00:31:11.960
to my parents. I really was. Because I would

00:31:11.960 --> 00:31:14.240
be like, well, what about so -and -so? What about

00:31:14.240 --> 00:31:17.119
Sally? We're giving her a title, but we need

00:31:17.119 --> 00:31:18.900
to teach her the title. We need to help her.

00:31:18.980 --> 00:31:21.740
And I was always wanting to make sure that every

00:31:21.740 --> 00:31:23.740
employee was in the right place and that they

00:31:23.740 --> 00:31:25.240
were learning and that they were getting the

00:31:25.240 --> 00:31:27.589
education they need. I didn't know. that that

00:31:27.589 --> 00:31:29.849
was called servant leaders. I didn't know that

00:31:29.849 --> 00:31:32.430
I was a servant leader at heart and that that

00:31:32.430 --> 00:31:34.569
is really the true thing, putting people over

00:31:34.569 --> 00:31:36.529
profits. And then I would hear, Adrian, stop,

00:31:36.730 --> 00:31:38.230
we got it, don't worry about it, just keep selling.

00:31:38.309 --> 00:31:40.349
And I'm like, no, but what about that? And I

00:31:40.349 --> 00:31:42.089
was always like thinking that way and always

00:31:42.089 --> 00:31:44.589
about the delegation. And also you had said something

00:31:44.589 --> 00:31:49.200
before that, but of course my brain. So, but

00:31:49.200 --> 00:31:51.160
you're making such a great point. I think that

00:31:51.160 --> 00:31:53.440
this is so important for people because when

00:31:53.440 --> 00:31:56.500
you are going to be a leader, I love that. And

00:31:56.500 --> 00:31:58.619
not maybe running your own company as an entrepreneur,

00:31:58.759 --> 00:32:01.420
but leaders, they really, they really do need

00:32:01.420 --> 00:32:04.880
to understand this because otherwise to me, there's

00:32:04.880 --> 00:32:07.559
nothing worse than not giving someone a chance

00:32:07.559 --> 00:32:10.059
to grow. So as a leader, not a manager, but as

00:32:10.059 --> 00:32:12.640
a leader, you have a responsibility. And if you're

00:32:12.640 --> 00:32:15.480
not wanting to make sure so, but I guess it's

00:32:15.480 --> 00:32:16.920
self -reflecting, right? You either got the person.

00:32:16.970 --> 00:32:19.569
says, Rhonda, I'm a great leader. Everyone loves

00:32:19.569 --> 00:32:22.089
me. All my surveys are coming back really great.

00:32:22.349 --> 00:32:24.609
I'm getting a lot of feedback. I'm getting more

00:32:24.609 --> 00:32:26.730
people to lead. I'm doing a great job, and I

00:32:26.730 --> 00:32:29.069
know it. But really, if you're saying that, then

00:32:29.069 --> 00:32:31.029
you definitely need to look in that mirror and

00:32:31.029 --> 00:32:34.450
really look right now. And then some companies

00:32:34.450 --> 00:32:36.890
will do leadership evaluations. Can you evaluate

00:32:36.890 --> 00:32:40.569
this person? That's awkward. As an employee,

00:32:41.230 --> 00:32:44.319
that's awkward. In my mind, I don't like that

00:32:44.319 --> 00:32:47.740
at all. And so I think that though there are

00:32:47.740 --> 00:32:50.940
like, you just, you need to get someone else's

00:32:50.940 --> 00:32:53.259
advice, right? And so that is where I think like

00:32:53.259 --> 00:32:56.180
Aranda Palmer comes in because she's got the

00:32:56.180 --> 00:32:58.619
experience. So she's got the, the knowledge she's

00:32:58.619 --> 00:33:00.299
trained by John Maxwell. So when you come to

00:33:00.299 --> 00:33:06.789
Orlando, call me. Actually, this time I'm not

00:33:06.789 --> 00:33:08.769
going to actually make Orlando where I'm headed

00:33:08.769 --> 00:33:11.130
to Miami for a different thing. So, but I am

00:33:11.130 --> 00:33:14.990
in Miami. Nice, nice. I'm in Daytona. So yeah,

00:33:15.170 --> 00:33:17.089
no Miami for me. Well, maybe I should. My parents

00:33:17.089 --> 00:33:19.690
are there. Well, they're in there. But anyways,

00:33:20.869 --> 00:33:24.900
so I got to do this. It's been a while. But anyways,

00:33:25.119 --> 00:33:27.019
I am really glad to have you. I think that's

00:33:27.019 --> 00:33:29.299
a really great conversation. It's nice to just

00:33:29.299 --> 00:33:32.420
kind of refreshing to talk to a business coach

00:33:32.420 --> 00:33:34.460
that and I love that. I'm going to make this

00:33:34.460 --> 00:33:36.940
guess. I don't feel like you're just like my

00:33:36.940 --> 00:33:39.619
niche is 45 year old woman that are blah, blah,

00:33:39.660 --> 00:33:45.079
blah. You are men, woman. probably even college

00:33:45.079 --> 00:33:47.660
university students that are looking to. Can

00:33:47.660 --> 00:33:50.759
you imagine? I would love it if I had this opportunity

00:33:50.759 --> 00:33:53.259
to have. The youngest person I have right now

00:33:53.259 --> 00:33:57.259
is 27. But when I was talking with her, she said,

00:33:57.319 --> 00:34:00.039
man, you need to make a class. This needs to

00:34:00.039 --> 00:34:03.519
be a class that people graduate with. So we're

00:34:03.519 --> 00:34:06.140
looking at some junior colleges. If not a class,

00:34:06.259 --> 00:34:08.860
then maybe just another session that they can

00:34:08.860 --> 00:34:12.480
promote at the college or the junior colleges.

00:34:13.210 --> 00:34:15.130
it is. It's just like you just said, you know,

00:34:15.210 --> 00:34:17.329
man, if somebody would like you instinctively

00:34:17.329 --> 00:34:20.010
knew that was servant leadership, but if someone

00:34:20.010 --> 00:34:22.809
had come out to give you the vocabulary and to

00:34:22.809 --> 00:34:25.789
affirm you for what you already knew and do until

00:34:25.789 --> 00:34:29.110
years later, I know that 10 years later, I'm

00:34:29.110 --> 00:34:32.190
talking in my 2025, even when I worked for Muscular

00:34:32.190 --> 00:34:34.730
Dystrophy Association for 12 years, and yes,

00:34:34.849 --> 00:34:36.670
I met Jerry Lewis many times. But even when I

00:34:36.670 --> 00:34:40.559
worked for MDA, I was like what like What is

00:34:40.559 --> 00:34:42.179
wrong with me? I like I really thought that there

00:34:42.179 --> 00:34:44.820
was something What weirdly wrong with me and

00:34:44.820 --> 00:34:47.920
it was only a few years ago I was working with

00:34:47.920 --> 00:34:50.159
with a woman who ended up passing away with the

00:34:50.159 --> 00:34:51.800
Hispanic Chamber of Commerce So we were doing

00:34:51.800 --> 00:34:53.519
servant leadership workshops and I'm like, oh

00:34:53.519 --> 00:34:56.219
my god. I am actually literally am oh I want

00:34:56.219 --> 00:34:58.860
I know what I want to ask you before we go workaholism

00:34:58.860 --> 00:35:04.239
because I I don't think I'm a workaholic and

00:35:09.769 --> 00:35:13.269
But I also feel like it's in my blood. I only

00:35:13.269 --> 00:35:15.190
know from what my parents said. So my parents

00:35:15.190 --> 00:35:16.969
taught me a couple of things. One is they said,

00:35:17.550 --> 00:35:19.989
never say you're busy. One day I said, I'm really

00:35:19.989 --> 00:35:22.050
busy. And they're like, my mom sat me down. It

00:35:22.050 --> 00:35:24.250
was a big meeting. It was important to them.

00:35:24.789 --> 00:35:26.670
Like, no. Adrienne, first of all, my mom was

00:35:26.670 --> 00:35:28.929
very clear. She's like, you are not as busy as

00:35:28.929 --> 00:35:31.750
a woman that has the baby at home. Like, put

00:35:31.750 --> 00:35:33.630
it in perspective, right? And then she's like,

00:35:33.789 --> 00:35:36.820
every time you say you're busy, mindset. My mom

00:35:36.820 --> 00:35:39.739
was pretty smart. She really knew. I'm triggering

00:35:39.739 --> 00:35:43.099
myself to say I'm so busy. And she's like, you

00:35:43.099 --> 00:35:45.639
may have, Adrienne, you may say it to the wrong

00:35:45.639 --> 00:35:48.280
person. A client hears it. Let's just say I'm

00:35:48.280 --> 00:35:49.659
at a baseball game. I'm like, oh my God, I'm

00:35:49.659 --> 00:35:52.280
so busy, so many clients. Oh, I was going to

00:35:52.280 --> 00:35:55.059
ask Adrian if she can do this for me or I want

00:35:55.059 --> 00:35:57.320
to buy something from her. She's so busy. I hear

00:35:57.320 --> 00:35:59.800
it all the time. I'm on this app called chatter

00:35:59.800 --> 00:36:04.320
social chatter. Social is a social audio app.

00:36:04.380 --> 00:36:06.500
It is amazing. That's where I do the true crime

00:36:06.500 --> 00:36:09.119
with Joseph. I absolutely love it and you could

00:36:09.119 --> 00:36:11.639
run different meetings and there's a variety

00:36:11.639 --> 00:36:14.179
of life coach and business coaches and real like

00:36:14.179 --> 00:36:15.880
there's all it's all business professionals.

00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:19.789
But when I hear someone say. I'm so busy. I have

00:36:19.789 --> 00:36:23.429
clients till 2030, I think. Yeah. And then you're

00:36:23.429 --> 00:36:25.469
not going to get any more clients because I don't

00:36:25.469 --> 00:36:26.750
want to work with you if you're telling me you're

00:36:26.750 --> 00:36:30.449
so busy. Like it's worn as a badge of honor.

00:36:32.710 --> 00:36:37.530
I think it's a badge of failure. I think that

00:36:37.530 --> 00:36:39.909
you're admitting to yourself that you can't handle

00:36:39.909 --> 00:36:43.440
your own time. Yes, so you're saying I'm so busy

00:36:43.440 --> 00:36:46.820
and then I hear I can't manage my time. I can't

00:36:46.820 --> 00:36:48.780
handle my amount of work I don't know how to

00:36:48.780 --> 00:36:51.300
collaborate with anyone to help me I have no

00:36:51.300 --> 00:36:53.219
support because I don't know how to find someone

00:36:53.219 --> 00:36:55.960
to reach out to them and I'm in a situation right

00:36:55.960 --> 00:36:57.920
now where I'm just gonna go around and say I'm

00:36:57.920 --> 00:36:59.679
so busy thinking that people are gonna think

00:36:59.679 --> 00:37:01.880
I'm a wow and you know what people think they

00:37:01.880 --> 00:37:05.420
think you are a a now like I don't even care

00:37:05.420 --> 00:37:06.760
to come up with something that rhymes with it.

00:37:06.900 --> 00:37:10.139
You're a bowel. Yeah. Right. You're just so don't

00:37:10.139 --> 00:37:12.699
say I'm so busy people. This is from Rhonda and

00:37:12.699 --> 00:37:16.039
I stop using that term. You have to stop. Another

00:37:16.039 --> 00:37:18.260
thing my mom taught me is if I said to him about

00:37:18.260 --> 00:37:20.880
my mom, if I said, well, she said my mom would

00:37:20.880 --> 00:37:24.900
be what's her name? Rhonda. Well, the caller

00:37:24.900 --> 00:37:29.119
by her name. So I was very much told, don't use

00:37:29.119 --> 00:37:32.480
him, he, she. So pronouns, when the whole pronouns

00:37:32.480 --> 00:37:34.980
came out, I was like, no, no, you can't use pronouns.

00:37:35.199 --> 00:37:37.699
Like I, like it just was like, you know, so that

00:37:37.699 --> 00:37:39.940
is really nice. Your mama was very, you need

00:37:39.940 --> 00:37:41.480
to write a little book about your mama. That

00:37:41.480 --> 00:37:45.639
was some good advice. She was, my mom was really

00:37:45.639 --> 00:37:49.099
amazing. My dad taught me, do it now. He would

00:37:49.099 --> 00:37:50.639
he would say Adrian, I want you to make blah

00:37:50.639 --> 00:37:52.579
blah blah blah blah blah cause but he was such

00:37:52.579 --> 00:37:54.880
a smart man He had an extra phone with a desk

00:37:54.880 --> 00:37:57.780
in his office and I'd say okay I'm gonna go downstairs

00:37:57.780 --> 00:38:00.159
to my office and I will 35 years I work with

00:38:00.159 --> 00:38:01.920
a family business and I'll do it and my dad's

00:38:01.920 --> 00:38:07.130
like You don't see the phone right there My dad's

00:38:07.130 --> 00:38:09.230
like, no, you need to make the call now. Do it

00:38:09.230 --> 00:38:12.010
now. And he taught me now, pick up the phone

00:38:12.010 --> 00:38:15.829
now. As much as you can do something now, don't

00:38:15.829 --> 00:38:18.130
wait. So, you know, so I have a client and they're

00:38:18.130 --> 00:38:20.050
always like, well, you know, you can wait till

00:38:20.050 --> 00:38:21.869
later to do it. I'm like, no, my dad said do

00:38:21.869 --> 00:38:24.590
it now. Like he may be buried in heaven fooling

00:38:24.590 --> 00:38:27.650
around and having fun with my mom, but she literally.

00:38:28.079 --> 00:38:30.139
I have to do it now. So when I get those emails,

00:38:30.280 --> 00:38:32.420
once I open up an email, I have to do it now.

00:38:32.539 --> 00:38:34.860
So people like you're such a workaholic and not

00:38:34.860 --> 00:38:37.440
though, because I know the balance of life. I

00:38:37.440 --> 00:38:39.219
know if there's a Saturday and I want to take

00:38:39.219 --> 00:38:40.739
a break, I will take a break because I'm a big

00:38:40.739 --> 00:38:43.980
girl and I wear big panties. No, actually, they're

00:38:43.980 --> 00:38:46.420
not as big anymore. But like, I really have to

00:38:46.420 --> 00:38:50.380
say that that I understand. And so I don't even

00:38:50.380 --> 00:38:52.659
know what a workaholic looks like, because I

00:38:52.659 --> 00:38:54.980
know it's not me. I know when I'm tired, I'm

00:38:54.980 --> 00:38:57.099
done. I know when to quit for the day. But I

00:38:57.099 --> 00:38:59.440
also know So the more I can accomplish, the better

00:38:59.440 --> 00:39:01.300
it's going to be for my own career. My business,

00:39:01.420 --> 00:39:03.800
I'm a budding business too, 10 years in business,

00:39:03.980 --> 00:39:05.719
professional global etiquette, because I don't

00:39:05.719 --> 00:39:07.619
even have it anywhere on my, wow, Adrienne, what

00:39:07.619 --> 00:39:11.079
happened to my hole? Anyways, so I teach corporate

00:39:11.079 --> 00:39:14.739
etiquette, LinkedIn, and podcast producer. I

00:39:14.739 --> 00:39:17.360
love podcasts. Oh, you mentioned about, so do

00:39:17.360 --> 00:39:19.199
you take your clients and then highlight them

00:39:19.199 --> 00:39:21.699
on your podcast? I don't really, I don't have

00:39:21.699 --> 00:39:24.599
a podcast yet, but I do put them in, you know,

00:39:24.619 --> 00:39:27.460
I'll highlight them in LinkedIn or on my blog

00:39:27.460 --> 00:39:32.360
or in my workshops, you know, so I use success

00:39:32.360 --> 00:39:35.000
stories from them. And if they'll, some of the

00:39:35.000 --> 00:39:37.059
things I'll do, I mean, if they'll give me a

00:39:37.059 --> 00:39:40.000
positive review on LinkedIn or Google or whatever,

00:39:40.219 --> 00:39:43.159
then, you know, I'll go in because, and my point

00:39:43.159 --> 00:39:46.820
of that is to build SEO. So when I like, If you

00:39:46.820 --> 00:39:48.960
if you don't mind, when we finish and you have

00:39:48.960 --> 00:39:52.380
some product, either a YouTube video or a Spotify

00:39:52.380 --> 00:39:55.159
clip or whatever, I would ask you, can I use

00:39:55.159 --> 00:39:58.719
pieces of this on my blog? And then my blog will

00:39:58.719 --> 00:40:00.420
have your name and your you know, you've already

00:40:00.420 --> 00:40:02.940
got my name, so it'll increase both of our SEO.

00:40:03.059 --> 00:40:04.679
So that's how I do that. And then if somebody

00:40:04.679 --> 00:40:07.090
agrees with that. who I'm working with, I usually

00:40:07.090 --> 00:40:08.710
give them another free session or something,

00:40:08.889 --> 00:40:11.849
you know. I love that. Yeah, so you should receive,

00:40:12.010 --> 00:40:13.909
hopefully if everything works out with Calendly,

00:40:14.349 --> 00:40:18.340
you should receive a request for feedback. And

00:40:18.340 --> 00:40:21.480
then you go to my Google My Business page. I

00:40:21.480 --> 00:40:23.460
can't believe how many businesses leaders don't

00:40:23.460 --> 00:40:25.559
have a Google My Business page. I mean, I just

00:40:25.559 --> 00:40:27.719
know the bare minimum. I am a LinkedIn expert.

00:40:27.920 --> 00:40:30.079
That's what I do and I love. I could also, if

00:40:30.079 --> 00:40:32.260
you're interested in, I want to talk more about

00:40:32.260 --> 00:40:34.780
starting your own podcast. Happy to talk with

00:40:34.780 --> 00:40:36.800
you about that and kind of give you some breakdowns

00:40:36.800 --> 00:40:38.599
of what that looks like. I've been doing this

00:40:38.599 --> 00:40:41.800
for about four years. So I think I'm like 250,

00:40:41.960 --> 00:40:45.360
260. But my real fun is being the true crime,

00:40:45.360 --> 00:40:47.960
because I just have so much fun. check that out.

00:40:48.139 --> 00:40:51.119
But I love this no prep needed idea. That's very

00:40:51.119 --> 00:40:53.940
cool. But go back to your workaholicism. I'm

00:40:53.940 --> 00:40:56.699
gonna have to agree with you on several points

00:40:56.699 --> 00:41:01.260
because now there are functioning workaholics,

00:41:01.280 --> 00:41:03.659
just like there are functioning alcoholics, okay?

00:41:04.400 --> 00:41:08.300
But so the question becomes, are you working

00:41:08.300 --> 00:41:11.219
to avoid something else? And if that answer is

00:41:11.219 --> 00:41:14.460
no, I mean you're not trying to avoid something

00:41:14.460 --> 00:41:17.570
at home. You're not trying to avoid a hard conversation

00:41:17.570 --> 00:41:21.130
with someone else. You're not trying to cover

00:41:21.130 --> 00:41:24.090
up shame for not working in your past or whatever.

00:41:24.389 --> 00:41:26.769
You know, we uncover those kinds of things because

00:41:26.769 --> 00:41:29.550
I work, when you're a driven leader or like you

00:41:29.550 --> 00:41:31.449
have your own business, you come from a family

00:41:31.449 --> 00:41:34.389
business, it's hard to peel those layers back

00:41:34.389 --> 00:41:39.969
and am I really a workaholic or am I avoiding

00:41:39.969 --> 00:41:42.460
something else and I'm just... taking my time

00:41:42.460 --> 00:41:44.780
and slowly doing this work. But I believe, like

00:41:44.780 --> 00:41:46.820
you, if they wear this badge of honor, oh, I

00:41:46.820 --> 00:41:50.079
worked 14 hours today, I don't say, wow, that's

00:41:50.079 --> 00:41:52.840
awesome. I say, man, I could really help you.

00:41:53.039 --> 00:41:57.679
You know, I believe that you're like, I have

00:41:57.679 --> 00:42:00.360
this one talk I do called blocks, clocks and

00:42:00.360 --> 00:42:03.380
socks. And it's basically about delegation and,

00:42:03.380 --> 00:42:07.320
you know, you you're modeling how to Put a boundary

00:42:07.320 --> 00:42:10.159
on your own time a little bit. And then the socks

00:42:10.159 --> 00:42:12.340
is for you. When you go home, kick off your shoes.

00:42:12.619 --> 00:42:14.519
When you have enough time to do something, not

00:42:14.519 --> 00:42:16.300
when you go home and you're exhausted. You don't

00:42:16.300 --> 00:42:18.300
even, you can't even barely eat and wash your

00:42:18.300 --> 00:42:20.179
teeth, brush your teeth and wash your body before

00:42:20.179 --> 00:42:22.320
you go to sleep. I work with so many people and

00:42:22.320 --> 00:42:24.739
one of the first questions I ask them is describe

00:42:24.739 --> 00:42:27.739
your normal nighttime routine before you go to

00:42:27.739 --> 00:42:31.159
bed. 90 % of the people don't have one. They

00:42:31.159 --> 00:42:32.079
don't know what I'm talking about. They're just

00:42:32.079 --> 00:42:34.579
like, well, I just worked till I can't keep my

00:42:34.579 --> 00:42:37.329
eyes open anymore. I'm like, mm. Step one, let's

00:42:37.329 --> 00:42:40.550
get a nighttime routine. And so, you know, I

00:42:40.550 --> 00:42:42.530
would ask you that. So people accuse you of being

00:42:42.530 --> 00:42:45.230
a workaholic. Now, I do have a questionnaire,

00:42:45.469 --> 00:42:47.750
too, because, and one of the things on there

00:42:47.750 --> 00:42:51.730
is, do other people accuse you of being a workaholic?

00:42:52.210 --> 00:42:54.570
And then if the answer is yes, who is it? Is

00:42:54.570 --> 00:42:56.369
it people you work with or is it your family?

00:42:56.630 --> 00:42:58.829
If it's your family, that could be a communication

00:42:58.829 --> 00:43:01.969
error. And the way we help that is we say, here's

00:43:01.969 --> 00:43:04.030
my calendar for the next month. These are the

00:43:04.030 --> 00:43:06.369
nights I have to work late. These are the Saturdays

00:43:06.369 --> 00:43:08.070
when I have an event or this is when I have a

00:43:08.070 --> 00:43:09.949
board meeting or these, you know, and there's

00:43:09.949 --> 00:43:12.230
communication. So oh, but I'm going to make it

00:43:12.230 --> 00:43:14.349
up to you because on Sunday we're all going to

00:43:14.349 --> 00:43:15.809
go to the park or we're going to do this or,

00:43:15.809 --> 00:43:18.070
you know, where you're trading. So maybe it's

00:43:18.070 --> 00:43:20.530
not balanced every single day, but in a month

00:43:20.530 --> 00:43:24.409
or in a quarter, it's balanced. And and and maybe

00:43:24.409 --> 00:43:26.929
I don't get to eat supper with you every night.

00:43:26.929 --> 00:43:29.510
But on the nights that I do, there's no phone

00:43:29.510 --> 00:43:32.309
at the table. There's no TV on. And we have this

00:43:32.309 --> 00:43:34.550
scripted conversation. What was the best part

00:43:34.550 --> 00:43:37.190
of your day to day? And what was the worst? And

00:43:37.190 --> 00:43:38.730
can I help you on anything that was the worst

00:43:38.730 --> 00:43:41.269
or was that a fluke? And it's the same conversation

00:43:41.269 --> 00:43:43.010
every day, but it gets y 'all into that pattern

00:43:43.010 --> 00:43:46.389
of talking and people expect it and you open

00:43:46.389 --> 00:43:48.730
up a little better. And instead of just, how

00:43:48.730 --> 00:43:51.010
was your day today, honey? I was good. What'd

00:43:51.010 --> 00:43:54.219
you do? Nothing really. Oh my God, I love, I

00:43:54.219 --> 00:43:56.059
love love. Another thing when you're saying you're

00:43:56.059 --> 00:43:58.559
busy is that you're kind of leaving impression

00:43:58.559 --> 00:44:01.199
that you're busier than I am. So now you're also

00:44:01.199 --> 00:44:04.300
making fun of, right? Yeah, it is really condescending.

00:44:04.340 --> 00:44:05.800
Just take it out of your vocabulary, people.

00:44:06.219 --> 00:44:08.619
I really enjoyed speaking with you. What I'm

00:44:08.619 --> 00:44:10.280
gonna do now is I'm gonna go down the Rhonda

00:44:10.280 --> 00:44:13.000
Palmer, like rabbit hole. I'm going to follow

00:44:13.000 --> 00:44:15.519
you on everywhere. And then this should air in

00:44:15.519 --> 00:44:18.840
a couple of weeks. And I usually release on Wednesday.

00:44:18.860 --> 00:44:20.480
So I think I have a couple more in front of you

00:44:20.480 --> 00:44:22.960
and then I'm excited to release it. this here

00:44:22.960 --> 00:44:26.119
that hopefully people you you are really interesting

00:44:26.119 --> 00:44:28.960
i really enjoyed speaking with you you are too

00:44:28.960 --> 00:44:31.159
we need to definitely stay in touch and i would

00:44:31.159 --> 00:44:33.280
love to come back in a few months after i get

00:44:33.280 --> 00:44:36.340
that book published it's called ease into leadership

00:44:36.340 --> 00:44:38.340
and i will definitely come back and talk about

00:44:38.340 --> 00:44:42.760
that do you have um do you have a linkedin yes

00:44:42.760 --> 00:44:46.940
so i'm ronda freeman parmer on linkedin And I'm

00:44:46.940 --> 00:44:50.860
on YouTube, Rhonda Palmer Leadership 101. That's

00:44:50.860 --> 00:44:54.519
just getting started. But Instagram, the Rhonda

00:44:54.519 --> 00:44:58.780
Palmer, and of course, website RhondaParmor .com.

00:44:58.880 --> 00:45:01.380
Super easy. But I just have to remember, Palmer

00:45:01.380 --> 00:45:04.619
rhymes with farmer. I wanted to give you a little

00:45:04.619 --> 00:45:07.639
tip though, which I can see you doing, ease into

00:45:07.639 --> 00:45:09.719
leadership. So you know where it has the pronouns

00:45:09.719 --> 00:45:11.920
on your contact information, where you could

00:45:11.920 --> 00:45:15.219
put in your pronouns? Okay, go down. to the word

00:45:15.219 --> 00:45:18.639
says custom. And you have 25 characters. Mine

00:45:18.639 --> 00:45:20.920
when you click with me, mine says because I care

00:45:20.920 --> 00:45:23.059
because I actually care, which I just want to

00:45:23.059 --> 00:45:24.840
mention one thing about that. But you could actually

00:45:24.840 --> 00:45:27.199
have ease into leadership. So reach out to me

00:45:27.199 --> 00:45:29.940
if you have any questions. But it's and again

00:45:29.940 --> 00:45:32.579
if you go to the him her and then just you have

00:45:32.579 --> 00:45:34.099
like three different pronouns and then you'll

00:45:34.099 --> 00:45:36.119
see custom and then another window will pop up

00:45:36.119 --> 00:45:38.719
underneath 25 characters so put that name of

00:45:38.719 --> 00:45:41.280
the book so people can start hearing it and i'm

00:45:41.280 --> 00:45:43.239
doing a because i care because okay the other

00:45:43.239 --> 00:45:47.679
reason why i do it now is because I love the

00:45:47.679 --> 00:45:50.900
book Unreasonable Hospitality, and that is really

00:45:50.900 --> 00:45:53.679
just customer service where you're almost anticipating

00:45:53.679 --> 00:45:56.699
before what the client needs. I think that's

00:45:56.699 --> 00:46:00.000
really important. And so I really do care. So

00:46:00.000 --> 00:46:03.000
if someone is not happy with what I do, it will

00:46:03.000 --> 00:46:04.940
bother me forever. It's not like I could be like,

00:46:05.099 --> 00:46:08.019
oh, just shake it off. I work on how can I fix

00:46:08.019 --> 00:46:11.099
it? I really will examine everything to make

00:46:11.099 --> 00:46:15.559
sure. So one way that you do it is respond quickly.

00:46:16.079 --> 00:46:18.280
If you respond all the time and then you don't

00:46:18.280 --> 00:46:20.739
respond, the person's more apt to say, hey, because

00:46:20.739 --> 00:46:24.179
now it's a different behavior. And then usually,

00:46:24.519 --> 00:46:26.239
if they send me a reminder, I'm like, oh my god,

00:46:26.300 --> 00:46:28.440
thank you so much. It was in my junk mail. Or,

00:46:28.440 --> 00:46:32.949
yeah, I did miss that one. I think that you want

00:46:32.949 --> 00:46:35.329
to, how you want to be seen, how you see yourself

00:46:35.329 --> 00:46:37.809
in the perception of others. To me, it's important

00:46:37.809 --> 00:46:40.710
because I care. I really care. And some people

00:46:40.710 --> 00:46:42.210
will say, right? Like some people, I wrote that

00:46:42.210 --> 00:46:44.150
article too, where people will say, I don't care

00:46:44.150 --> 00:46:46.070
what other people think. I don't care. I don't

00:46:46.070 --> 00:46:48.170
need all these clients. If you don't like to

00:46:48.170 --> 00:46:49.590
work with me, I don't like to work with you.

00:46:49.889 --> 00:46:52.309
I like all of that is like, oh my God, that's

00:46:52.309 --> 00:46:54.730
so opposite of me. Like, I'm okay if you want

00:46:54.730 --> 00:46:56.789
to be that way, but I actually care. And I'm

00:46:56.789 --> 00:46:58.909
not embarrassed to say I care. I care what people

00:46:58.909 --> 00:47:01.050
think about me. I care what people say about

00:47:01.050 --> 00:47:03.929
me. I care if people think I can't pronounce

00:47:03.929 --> 00:47:06.230
philosophy or some word that I can't pronounce

00:47:06.230 --> 00:47:07.889
and I've got to like ask someone else for help.

00:47:08.030 --> 00:47:11.190
I care about all of that. But anyway, so thank

00:47:11.190 --> 00:47:13.070
you so much. I'm sorry. I took up 47 minutes

00:47:13.070 --> 00:47:15.670
and 11 seconds, but you know, I love it. Hey,

00:47:15.730 --> 00:47:17.190
I'm going to just go back because what you're

00:47:17.190 --> 00:47:19.809
saying about do it now. Your dad was a very wise

00:47:19.809 --> 00:47:23.269
man, but there's scientific research behind that.

00:47:23.349 --> 00:47:25.969
When you have an idea or something comes to your

00:47:25.969 --> 00:47:28.809
mind, do it now because that idea is energy.

00:47:28.889 --> 00:47:31.530
And when you have that energy to do it, you're

00:47:31.530 --> 00:47:33.150
going to do it a lot faster when you do it right

00:47:33.150 --> 00:47:36.010
now than if you get to it later. So just scientifically

00:47:36.010 --> 00:47:38.170
proving your dad was right and affirming what

00:47:38.170 --> 00:47:40.869
you already do. I really enjoy meeting you. Thank

00:47:40.869 --> 00:47:45.590
you so much. Thank you, Rhonda. I love it. OK,

00:47:45.690 --> 00:47:48.630
bye, everyone. Thank you for joining us. Awesomeness.

00:47:49.730 --> 00:47:51.550
Oh, Rhonda, that was.